What do you call a very active hydra?
Hydradynamic.
Afraid he wouldn’t get into college the skeleton spent the weekend boning up on algebra.
What do you call a duck with fangs?
Quackula.
Why didn't the ghost dance at the party? He had no body to dance with.
What kind of jewelry do witches wear?
Charm bracelets.
What kind of chocolate do ghouls like?
Hearse-sheys!
What do you call a skeleton who goes to school but doesn’t do any work?
Lazy bones.
How does a Ghost say good-bye? - I can’t wait to seance you again.
What did one of Frankenstein’s ears say to the other?
I didn’t know we lived on the same block.
What is it called when a skeleton lawyer works for free!
Pro Bone-O.
What did the skeleton say when he went riding on his motorcycle?
- I’m bone to be wild!
How do you kill a troll?
Take away its internet access.
Why did the ghoul become green?
It was sick of eating brains!
What is Frankenstein’s favorite cheese?
Muenster.
What do skeletons hate the most about the wind?
Nothing. It goes right through them.
I've always wondered if it was easy to catch Bigfoot...
I was relieved when my doctor told me it wasn't a disease.
What did the Wicked Witch of the West say when she extracted metal from ore?
I’m smelting!
Why are ghouls so healthy?
They always eat fresh food!
Where is the ghost going on holiday the next year? Lake Eerie.
What keeps ghouls happy?
The knowledge that every shroud has a silver lining!
What happens if you cross a hairdresser and a werewolf?
A creature with an all over perm!
How did the little Scottish dog feel when he saw a werewolf?
Terrier-fied!
Which building do vampires always visit when in New York?
The Vampire State Building.
What’s a vampire's favorite fruit?
A neck-tarine.
The ghoul didn't get his letter on time because it got lost at the ghost office.
Why did king Minos put Minotaur inside a labyrinth?
He wanted to amaze his wife.
Did you hear about the skeleton who dropped out of medical school?
He didn’t have the stomach for it.
What does a polite vampire say to its victim?
- Fang you very much.
On reflection, vampires aren't actually that scary.
What do you call a ghost who haunts fireplaces? A toastie ghostie.
What flavor of ice cream do vampires like best?
Vein-illa!
What did the Minotaur order at Starbucks?
Half-calf.
Why was the zombie so grumpy?
He woke up on the wrong side of the dead.
What online search engine do spooky monsters use?
Ghoulghoul.
This zombie kept cutting the line so I gave her a piece of my mind.
She said it was yummy.
Where do werewolves store their things?
In a were-house.
The vampires were in a mood, so I thought I'd do something to cheer them up. They were over the moon that I re-vamped their castle.
What is a werewolf’s favorite tree?
A lu-pine.
What do you call a titan that can't swim?
Titanic.
What did the ghost buy at the bar? Boos!
What do you call it when a monster gets mad?
Ogre-reacting!
What did the zombie say when she fell out with her vampire friend?
- You're dead to me!
Why did the Ghosts win the soccer match? They scored more Ghouls.
What happened to the man who didn’t pay his exorcist? His house was repossessed.
How did Dr. Frankenstein pay the men who built his monster?
On a piece rate.
How do you talk to giants?
Use big words!
How does Frankenstein jump-start his day?
With a shock of lighting.
Why did the zombie take a sick day?
She had cold symp-tombs.
Why did the kraken eat 5 ships that were carrying potatoes?
Because nobody can eat just one potato ship.
What do you call witches who live together?
Broom-mates.
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