What did Dr. Frankenstein say when Pinocchio’s nose grew?
IT’S A LIEEEEE!!
What did Dr.Frankenstein say when his monster spat on him?
It’s saliva!
How did Frankenstein know Jesus was coming for a visit?
He used his frankincense.
What did Frankenstein say when he was struck by lightning?
Great! A jolt to the bolt!
Who will Frankenstein’s monster take to the dance?
Any old girl he can dig up.
What do you call it when Dr. Frankenstein makes tea?
A monstrositea.
I love making new friends.
That’s why I studied under Dr. Frankenstein.
Why did Frankenstein’s monster go to a psychiatrist?
He thought he had a screw loose.
Dr. Frankenstein just placed an order on Amazon.
It wasn't expensive, but I imagine the shipping cost him an arm and a leg.
Frankenstein's monster and the bride of Frankenstein sit down for dinner
Bride: How come you never help with the dinner
Frankenstein: I did
Bride: How?
Frankenstein: I did the mash...
Bride: Don't you dare
Was there a spark between Frankenstein and his bride?
Yes, he simply couldn’t resistor.
What do you call the Frankenstein of the Gardening world?
An A-botan-ation.
Where does a thrifty Frankenstein get his limbs?
At the second-hand store.
How does Frankenstein jump-start his day?
With a shock of lighting.
Why was Frankenstein’s monster always being arrested?
He was so easy to charge.
What tree monster prowls the forest?
Frankenpine.
Why is Frankenstein’s monster so popular?
He’s a real people person.
Dr. Frankenstein: Igor, have you seen my latest invention? It’s a new pill consisting of 50 percent glue and 50 percent aspirin.
Igor: But what is it for?
Dr. Frankenstein: For monsters with splitting headaches.
People say Frankenstein’s monster had a temper…
But actually he was surprisingly level-headed.
People keep asking me why I’m working for Dr. Frankenstein.
I’m just trying to make a living.
Dr. Frankenstein must have been pretty buff.
He was a bodybuilder, after all.
What is Frankenstein’s favorite cheese?
Muenster.
What happened when Dr. Frankenstein swallowed some uranium?
He got atomic ache.
How do you know Frankenstein is tired?
He’s dead on his feet.
What happened when Frankenstein’s monster first met his girlfriend?
It was love at first fright.
Who brings the monsters their babies?
Frankenstork.
Frankenstein’s monster was really worried one day.
“Pull yourself together”, said Frankenstein.
How does Frankenstein speak?
Frankly.
What was the inscription on the tomb of Frankenstein’s monster?
HERE LIES FRANKENSTEIN’S MONSTER. MAY HE REST IN PIECES.
Why did Frankenstein turn to solar?
For the free charge.
What do you call a clever monster?
Frank Einstein.
What did one of Frankenstein’s ears say to the other?
I didn’t know we lived on the same block.
What happened when the ice monster had a furious row with Frankenstein?
He gave him the cold shoulder!
Did you know Doctor Frankenstein used to be a lonely, lonely man?
Then he learned how to make friends.
Frankenstein entered a body-building competition…
And soon found he had seriously misunderstood the objective.
Why did Dr. Frankenstein hire Igor as his assistant?
He had a hunch about him.
Who did Frankenstein take to the prom?
His ghoul friend.
Why is Frankenstein such good fun?
Because he soon has you in stitches.
Which musical group did Frankenstein not like at all?
The Village People.
Sad to hear that Baron von Frankenstein has given up on his dream of being an actor.
He couldn’t get the parts.
Why did Frankenstein tiptoe past the medicine cabinet?
He didn’t want to wake the sleeping pills!
What kind of dog did Frankenstein want for Christmas?
A lab.
Why is Frankenstein always asking for help?
He’s looking for someone to give him a hand.
How did Dr. Frankenstein pay the men who built his monster?
On a piece rate.
Why did Frankenstein’s monster give up boxing?
Because he didn’t want to spoil his looks.
What’s the best time for Frankenstein to go to a party?
Fright now.
How does Frankenstein eat his dinner?
He bolts it down.
What should you do when you see Frankenstein walking towards you?
Make a bolt for it.
What monster plays the most April Fool’s jokes?
Prankenstein!
Why doesn’t Frankenstein go on airplanes?
He can’t get past the airport metal detector.
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