Why doesn’t Frankenstein go on airplanes?
He can’t get past the airport metal detector.
What is Frankenstein’s favorite cheese?
Muenster.
Why did Dr. Frankenstein hire Igor as his assistant?
He had a hunch about him.
Sad to hear that Baron von Frankenstein has given up on his dream of being an actor.
He couldn’t get the parts.
Why did Frankenstein turn to solar?
For the free charge.
What happened when Frankenstein’s monster first met his girlfriend?
It was love at first fright.
How do you know Frankenstein is tired?
He’s dead on his feet.
I love making new friends.
That’s why I studied under Dr. Frankenstein.
How does Frankenstein eat his dinner?
He bolts it down.
What did Dr.Frankenstein say when his monster spat on him?
It’s saliva!
People keep asking me why I’m working for Dr. Frankenstein.
I’m just trying to make a living.
Who did Frankenstein take to the prom?
His ghoul friend.
Why is Frankenstein such good fun?
Because he soon has you in stitches.
Where does a thrifty Frankenstein get his limbs?
At the second-hand store.
What do you call it when Dr. Frankenstein makes tea?
A monstrositea.
What kind of dog did Frankenstein want for Christmas?
A lab.
What monster plays the most April Fool’s jokes?
Prankenstein!
Why did Frankenstein’s monster give up boxing?
Because he didn’t want to spoil his looks.
Why didn’t Dr. Frankenstein ever make a second monster?
Because he just didn’t have the guts to do it again.
We all know Albert Einstein was a genius…
But his brother Frank was a monster.
Why is Frankenstein always asking for help?
He’s looking for someone to give him a hand.
Frankenstein’s monster was really worried one day.
“Pull yourself together”, said Frankenstein.
Was there a spark between Frankenstein and his bride?
Yes, he simply couldn’t resistor.
What is Dr. Frankenstein’s favorite part of a company?
Human resources.
What did Dr. Frankenstein say when Pinocchio’s nose grew?
IT’S A LIEEEEE!!
What did Frankenstein say when he was struck by lightning?
Great! A jolt to the bolt!
Who brings the monsters their babies?
Frankenstork.
Frankenstein entered a body-building competition…
And soon found he had seriously misunderstood the objective.
Why did Frankenstein tiptoe past the medicine cabinet?
He didn’t want to wake the sleeping pills!
Which musical group did Frankenstein not like at all?
The Village People.
Frankenstein's monster and the bride of Frankenstein sit down for dinner
Bride: How come you never help with the dinner
Frankenstein: I did
Bride: How?
Frankenstein: I did the mash...
Bride: Don't you dare
What happened when Dr. Frankenstein swallowed some uranium?
He got atomic ache.
People say Frankenstein’s monster had a temper…
But actually he was surprisingly level-headed.
Dr. Frankenstein: Igor, have you seen my latest invention? It’s a new pill consisting of 50 percent glue and 50 percent aspirin.
Igor: But what is it for?
Dr. Frankenstein: For monsters with splitting headaches.
What’s Frankenstein’s favorite food?
Frankenfurters.
How did Frankenstein know Jesus was coming for a visit?
He used his frankincense.
How did Dr. Frankenstein pay the men who built his monster?
On a piece rate.
What tree monster prowls the forest?
Frankenpine.
How does Frankenstein speak?
Frankly.
What happened when the ice monster had a furious row with Frankenstein?
He gave him the cold shoulder!
Who will Frankenstein’s monster take to the dance?
Any old girl he can dig up.
What is Frankenstein’s favorite cheese?
Muenster.
Why is Frankenstein’s monster so popular?
He’s a real people person.
Why did Frankenstein’s monster go to a psychiatrist?
He thought he had a screw loose.
What do you call a clever monster?
Frank Einstein.
Dr. Frankenstein just placed an order on Amazon.
It wasn't expensive, but I imagine the shipping cost him an arm and a leg.
Did you know Doctor Frankenstein used to be a lonely, lonely man?
Then he learned how to make friends.
What did one of Frankenstein’s ears say to the other?
I didn’t know we lived on the same block.
Why was Frankenstein’s monster always being arrested?
He was so easy to charge.
Dr. Frankenstein must have been pretty buff.
He was a bodybuilder, after all.
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