Accidentally spilled frosting all over the freezer.
Going to leave it be though, since the freezer has an auto defrost feature.
At what point will you love to change your bulbs the most?
When sparks fly.
What kind of fire moistens?
A humidifier.
I went to a Church yard sale looking for a grill...
Unfortunately, they only had friars.
How do you turn a duck into a soul singer?
Stick him in an oven until his Bill Withers
Where do light bulbs go shopping?
The outlet stores.
My friend had put some beans in the coffee grinder
After a few seconds I told him to stop. That's fine.
Why was the teapot sitting in the corner?
It was having a pour attitude.
What do you call a catholic toaster strudel?
A pope tart.
What do you call a skeleton in a freezer?
Bone-chilling.
How many software engineers do you need to change a light bulb?
None – it’s a hardware problem.
If you plant a light bulb in your garden, does it grow into a power plant?
Asked my boy to boil the kettle.
He said, "wouldn't it be better to boil some water?"
I sold my cleaning equipment.
It was just collecting dust.
Why was the broken air conditioner already sad?
Because it couldn’t vent it’s problems.
My dad wanted to teach me to fix the car but all I did was hold the flashlight.
I guess I'll never hold a candle to him.
Don't ever change a light bulb while the oven is on
You'll get burned out
One blender turns to the one next to it and says "You're looking exceptionally good today!"
So the other replies, "You're such a smoothie talker"
What is the difference between lightning and electricity. For electricity, you need to pay, but
lightning kills for free.”
What do mushrooms watch on TV?
Spores.
My wife is threatening to leave me because of my obsession with acting like a TV news anchor.
More on this after the break.
Did you hear about the abusive flashlight? It was charged with battery.
I gave my wife a lamp for our anniversary.
Someone’s getting LED tonight.
I took my friends watch that had an LED flashlight on it.
Now it's my time to shine.
Our landlord knocked on our door today and said that if we didn't pay rent, they'd turn off the heater tomorrow.
It was our last warming.
What do you call a bad electrician? A shock absorber!
I got tricked into buying a cooling fan that didn't work...
It was an air con.
I brought a new vacuum cleaner.
It sucks.
Go to BabaMail
