One of the punny pig names for a pig that loves Shakespeare is Hamlet.
What did the introverted pig say when asked why they don’t like socializing?
“I’m not a people porcine.”
What did the pig do when it came to a pork in the road? It pigged the road less traveled.
Walking through the farm and a group of pigs jumped out of a tree at me. It was a hambush.
What happens when you play tug-of-war with a pug?
Pulled pork!
Why do piglets take home economics in school? To learn how to sow.
What do you call a pig with skin problems? A wart-hog.
If you want to name a smart pig, name him Cunningham.
What do you call a pig that does a lot of charity work?
Philanthropig
What do you say to a procrastinating pig? Listen, bud, it’s snout or never.
What happened to the pig who ate too fast? They got a ticket for running a Slop Sign.
If pigs learned to fly, would the price of bacon skyrocket?
skyrocket
Any advice on getting a pet pig? Just be sure you get the pig of the litter.
What did the pig exclaim when the wolf grabbed its tail?
“That’s the end of me!”
I saw a pig with laryngitis.
He was disgruntled.
What did Papa Pig shout at his kids in the car?
“Stop swining! We’re nearly there.”
Why are pigs awful basketball players?
They hog the ball.
Why was the pig a pathological liar? It’s a porcine-ality disorder.
What do you call a pig that gets the test answer wrong?
Mistaken bacon.
How do pigs write top secret messages?
With invisible oink!
What’s the one book all piglets read in grade school? A Series of Un-porcine-ite Events.
What do you give a sick pig?
Oinkment.
I entered my pig into a pig race but he pulled a ham string.
What’s the first line of the pig bible? “In the bacon-ing…”
What kind of ice cream do pigs like best?
Hoggin Daz!
What do you call a pig that gets the test answer wrong? Mistaken bacon.
What’s the super-confusing way that pigs say I love you? “I a-boar-you.”
Why do pigs make awful football players?
They don’t like playing with the “pig skin.”
Why don’t pigs eat cake? Because they’re morally opposed to bacon.
What’s the one way you should never greet a male pig? “Sow, what’s up?”
What does a mommy pig say to her piglets at the end of the day? Time to pig up your toys.
What do you get when you cross a pig with a centipede?
Bacon and Legs.
What do you get when you pick a pig’s nose?
Ham boogers.
What happened to the pig who ate too fast? They got a ticket for running a Slop Sign.
How do you make a pig really happy on his birthday? Throw him a sow-prize party.
What do you call a pig who can’t mind his own business?
A nosey porker!
What do you call a guinea pig that has become a member of the mafia?
A hamster
What do you call it when a beautiful woman tries to trick you into giving her a pig?
A bae con.
What do you say to an overbearing pig? Stop porcine the issue.
What do pigs do on the evening of February 14th?
They have a valenswines dinner.
What advice did the grandpa pig have for his kids?
“Don’t take anything for grunted.”
What do you call it when a pig loses its memory? Hamnesia.
What do the lady pigs say when someone leaves the toilet seat up? “Hoof-orgot to put the seat down?"
If your piglet wants to be a wizard, there’s only one alternative: Hogwarts.
Why did the pig get fired? Insu-boar-dination.
What do you say to an overbearing pig? Stop porcine the issue.
Did you hear about the pig who opened a pawn shop?
He called it “Ham Hocks”
Where do pigs keep their money? Why in the piggy bank, of course.
Why should you never share a bed with a pig? They hog all the covers.
Why did it take the teen pig so long to get ready for school in the morning?
She was very piggy when it comes to choosing what to wear!