Why did it take the teen pig so long to get ready for school in the morning?
She was very piggy when it comes to choosing what to wear!
What happens when you play tug-of-war with a pug?
Pulled pork!
What do you call a pig with a rash? Ham and eczema.
Why don’t pigs eat cake? Because they’re morally opposed to bacon.
What’s the one book all piglets read in grade school? A Series of Un-porcine-ite Events.
What did the little piglet want from the swine?
A piggyback ride home.
Why did the piglet yell at his sibling at the dinner table? She was hogging the food.
What kind of ice cream do pigs like best?
Hoggin Daz!
When pigs work together, it’s known as collab-boar-ation.
What do 99 percent of pigs ask for on their hamburgers? Piggles.
What did the pig exclaim when the wolf grabbed its tail?
“That’s the end of me!”
What does an obstinate piglet always say to his mama?
“Sow what?”
What do pigs do on the evening of February 14th?
They have a valenswines dinner.
What do you call a pig that drives around recklessly?
A road hog.
Did you hear about the pig who opened a pawn shop?
He called it “Ham Hocks”
What do you say to a procrastinating pig? Listen, bud, it’s snout or never.
What do you call a pig who does karate?
A pork chop.
How do pigs get to the hospital?
In ham-bulances.
What do you say to an overbearing pig? Stop porcine the issue.
What did the pig do when it came to a pork in the road? It pigged the road less traveled.
Why did the piglet yell at his sibling at the dinner table?
She was hogging all the food!
What do you call a guinea pig that has become a member of the mafia?
A hamster
What’s it called when a bunch of pigs compete in athletic games?
The Olympigs
What’s a pig’s favorite holiday? Ar-boar Day.
What do you call a pig that gets the test answer wrong?
Mistaken bacon.
When pigs live high on the hog, they run the risk of going into hock.
How do you make a pig really happy on his birthday? Throw him a sow-prize party.
Any advice on getting a pet pig? Just be sure you get the pig of the litter.
A pig just won the lottery. What do you call him? Filthy rich.
Did you hear about the pig that ran the Post Office?
He was the first Porkmaster General.
What do you give a sick pig?
Oinkment.
What do you call a pig that gets the test answer wrong? Mistaken bacon.
What are pigs celebrating when they celebrate their birthday? The day they were boar-n.
What’s the difference between hot potato and a flying pig? One’s a heated yam, and the other is a yeeted ham.
What did the pig say to his friend who had been cheated upon?
Please don't go bacon this relationship.
Did you hear the horse and the pig are dating?
They’re in a stable relationship.
Walking through the farm and a group of pigs jumped out of a tree on me.
It was a hambush.
What do you call a Spanish pig?
Porque.
Why did the pig go to the casino?
To play the slop machine!
Why should you never rob a bank with a pig?
They always squeal.
The sweetest and punny name to call a pig is Mudpie.
What happened to the pig who ate too fast? They got a ticket for running a Slop Sign.
According to pig etiquette, piglets are meant to be porcine and not heard.
Why are pigs pink when they could be any pig-ment? Sow many reasons.
Did you hear about the pig who opened a pawn shop?
He called it “Ham Hocks”.
What do you call a pig that does a lot of charity work?
Philanthropig
Why did the pig break up with her boyfriend?
Because he was a boar.
I entered my pig into a pig race but he pulled a ham string.
Why should you never share a bed with a pig? They hog all the covers.
Why was the piglet whining.
He was boared out of his brains.