When pigs live high on the hog, they run the risk of going into hock.
Walking through the farm and a group of pigs jumped out of a tree at me. It was a hambush.
What’s the super-confusing way that pigs say I love you? “I a-boar-you.”
What does an obstinate piglet always say to his mama?
“Sow what?”
What did the little piglet want from the swine?
A piggyback ride home.
What do you get if you cross a dinosaur with a pig?
Jurassic Pork.
Why don’t pigs eat cake? Because they’re morally opposed to bacon.
Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Pig…
Pig who?
Pig on someone your own size!
What do you have left after a pig eats a watermelon?
Pork rinds.
Why was the pig crying? Because he was boar-ed to tears.
Any advice on getting a pet pig? Just be sure you get the pig of the litter.
When a pig takes out a loan, he becomes a boar-ower.
Why did the pig get fired? Insu-boar-dination.
In the 5th month of every year, my aunt lets her pigs in the field…
It’s mayham!
What’s the one way you should never greet a male pig? “Sow, what’s up?”
Why did the pig break up with her boyfriend?
Because he was a boar.
Why did the piglet yell at his sibling at the dinner table?
She was hogging all the food!
One of the punny pig names for a pig that loves Shakespeare is Hamlet.
I entered my pig into a pig race but he pulled a ham string.
What advice did the grandpa pig have for his kids?
“Don’t take anything for grunted.”
What do you say to a procrastinating pig? Listen, bud, it’s snout or never.
When a pig takes out a loan, he becomes a boar-ower.
What do pigs do on the evening of February 14th?
They have a valenswines dinner.
What do pig’s use as soap? Hogwash.
What did the pig do when it came to a pork in the road? It pigged the road less traveled.
What do pigs learn in the army? Ham to ham combat.
Why are pigs awful basketball players?
They hog the ball.
What do you call a pig who does karate?
A pork chop.
What’s the difference between hot potato and a flying pig? One’s a heated yam, and the other is a yeeted ham.
What’s the number one complaint pig spouses have about one another? Too stub-boar-n.
What do you call a pig that gets the test answer wrong? Mistaken bacon.
What do you call a cold, angry pig? A ham-brr-grr.
I saw a pig with laryngitis.
He was disgruntled.
What do you call a pig with a rash? Ham and eczema.
Why don’t pigs eat cake? Because they’re morally opposed to bacon.
Did you hear the horse and the pig are dating?
They’re in a stable relationship.
What do you say to a procrastinating pig? Listen, bud, it’s snout or never.
Why do piglets take home economics in school? To learn how to sow.
Why do pigs make awful football players?
They don’t like playing with the “pig skin.”
What do you call a pig with skin problems? A wart-hog.
A pig just won the lottery. What do you call him?
Filthy rich.
How do you make a pig really happy on his birthday? Throw him a sow-prize party.
What did the pig do when it came to a pork in the road? It pigged the road less traveled.
Did you hear about the pig who opened a pawn shop?
He called it “Ham Hocks”
What’s a pig’s favorite holiday? Ar-boar Day.
What’s the first line of the pig bible? “In the bacon-ing…”
Why was the pig a pathological liar? It’s a porcine-ality disorder.
How does a 20-something pig hit on someone?
They invite them over to Netflix and swill.
What do you call a pig with no legs?
A groundhog.
Why did the pig go to the casino?
To play the slop machine!