How do horses greet each other?
“Hayyyyy.”
What kind of car do fancy horses drive?
Mustangs.
How did the horse break into the mainframe?
It was a hack.
Where do you take a sick pony?
To the horse-pital.
Where do horses live in Harry Potter?
Diagonal Alley.
Why was Pegasus such a good ballerina?
He was flo-wing.
How does a horse get a suit fitted?
With a tail-or.
What’s a horse’s favorite fruit?
Canterlope.
What is the lesser-known sport used to measure a horse’s singing ability?
Carol racing.
Where do horses get their mane cut?
The hair-dressager.
What did one horse say to the other after he said he wanted to drop out?
That’s an equestionable decision.
What do horses get after graduating university?
A pedegree.
What did the pony say to the Jedi Knight before she left on her adventure?
“May the horse be with you.”
Why couldn’t the little girl ride the horse?
It was feeling bucky.
How does a horse drink wine?
With a de-canter.
What would a winged horse put in the bathtub?
A pegaLush bath bomb.
What does a horse call her best friend?
Her mane chick.
Why does a horse’s hair always look so good?
She mane-tains it.
What does a winged horse drink from at a party?
A keg-asus.
Why didn’t the horse buy a house?
The costs were mounting.
What’s does a winged horse like to munch on?
Pe-grass-us.
What’s a horse’s favorite dance move?
Watch me whip, now watch me neigh neigh.
How do horses show gratitude?
Flank you very much.
How does a rude princess sit on a horse?
Snide-saddle.
What type of car would a regular horse buy?
A Fjord Focus.
What did the Clydesdale use to deal cards at the casino?
A horse-shoe.
What kind of bread does a racehorse eat?
Thoroughbred.
What sickness do cowboys get from riding wild horses?
Bronchitis.
Why was the horse such a good dancer?
It perfected its halturn.
What do you call a pony running in a circle? Centrifugal horse.
What do winged horses attend in school? Pegclasses.
What do you call a horse that lives next door to you?
A neigh-bor.
Why didn’t the horse tell her friend she was a thief?
She didn’t want to saddle her with that information.
Why was the pony so excited to be invited to a rally with the president?
It was a huge end-horse-ment.
How do you wash a horse?
On a sponge-line.
Why would a horse make a good president?
They know how to lead.
Where do most horses work for their first job?
Re-tail stores.
Why was the horse feeling a bit sick?
Its voice was a bit hoarse.
Black Beauty - Now there's a dark horse.
What does a Clydesdale say when you offer them a carrot?
“Of course, my horse.”
How did the horse make payments?
In in-stallion-ments.
What does the winged horse do after it goes to the bathroom?
Pegaflushes.
What's black and white and eats like a horse?
A zebra.
What did the horse say to his friend that didn’t come party last night?
You didn’t turnout.
How did the horse know the others were gossiping about him?
He herd.
How does a horse tow its trailer?
With a Ford Bronco.
What’s a horse’s favorite grocery store?
No-fillies.
What cartoon do horses like to watch?
Whinny the Pooh.
What do you call an Amish guy with his hand in a horse's mouth?
A mechanic.
What’s a horse’s favorite sport?
Saddleball.