What type of car would a regular horse buy?
A Fjord Focus.
What do horses get after graduating university?
A pedegree.
How do winged horses walk if they become pirates?
Peg-asus legs.
What's black and white and eats like a horse?
A zebra.
Why couldn’t the equestrian find the carrots? They were down by the bay.
What natural disaster took out the ancient horses?
A volcanic stirruption.
How does a horse tow its trailer?
With a Ford Bronco.
What do you say when your horse proposes to your other horse?
Call the marrier!
What’s a racehorse’s favorite clothing brand? Jockey.
What did the jockey respond when someone asked to ride his horse?
“Dis-mount is mine.”
Where do horses get their mane cut?
The hair-dressager.
What does a horse call her best friend?
Her mane chick.
Who did the horse ask to be his second wife?
A manewer model.
Why was Pegasus such a good ballerina?
He was flo-wing.
What do you call an explosive horse?
Neigh-palm.
What’s the spiciest way to clean a horse?
With a curry comb.
What kind of bread does a racehorse eat?
Thoroughbred.
What did the horse reply when asked if it can jump 3 feet?
“I lope so!”
How could you tell the horse gained weight?
It had extra girth.
What did the pony say to the Jedi Knight before she left on her adventure?
“May the horse be with you.”
What’s a horse’s favorite animated movie?
Bolt.
What do you call an Amish guy with his hand in a horse's mouth?
A mechanic.
What do you call a pony running in a circle? Centrifugal horse.
What do horses eat with their salad? Dressage-ing.
How do ponies react when the opposing team comes on the field?
They horse-boo.
Why does the horse go to school?
It brings her fulfillyment.
Why did the horse like her new backpack?
The straps were adju-stable.
What did the horse say to his friend that didn’t come party last night?
You didn’t turnout.
Why was the horse sad she didn’t get the job?
She was flanking on it.