Q. What do you get if you cross a gorilla with a grizzly bear?
A. Fired from the zoo.
Q. What is a gorilla's favorite holiday?
A. Ape-ril Fools Day!
What is a gorillas second favourite fruit to eat behind bananas?=
Ape-ricots
Q. Why did the gorilla go to the barber?
A. He was concerned about his ape-pearance.
Q. Why was the blonde disappointed after her visit to an apiary?
A. There weren't any gorillas there. DUH!
What do you get if you cross a talking parrot with a gorilla?
I am not sure but if he says something you better damn well listen.
Q. Why was the lady baboon so atrracted to the big gorilla?
A. 'Cause he had s*x ape-peal.
Q. What do you call a gorilla who studies large primates and has great grades?
A. Ape lust student.
How do you prepare a Gorilla sundae? Your start getting it ready Fridae and Saturdae!
Q. Where do gorillas get their gossip?
A. From the grapevine.
Q. Why do educated gorillas like the numbers 1, 3, 5, 7, 11 and 13?
A. 'Cause they're prime apes.
What do you call a gorilla with a machine gun ?
Whatever it wants to be called.
Harambe wasn’t only one of the best gorillas I’ve ever met...
He was also a great ape.
Did you hear about the extremely serious gorilla?
He didn't monkey around.
Old gorillas never die, but they do go bananas.
What do you call a white skinned gorilla?
Honkey Kong.
What do gorillas and orangutans wear in the kitchen?
Ape-rons.
Q. Why was the baby gorilla such a big brat?
A. Because his parents are big apes.
What’s the first thing a gorilla learns in school? The ape b c’s.
Did you hear about the 2 apes that kept fighting with each other?
It was gorilla warfare.
Q. How do you make a sasquatch, a yeti, or a bigfoot laugh?
A. Tell it a gorilla joke!
What do you call a gorilla in a cement-mixer?
King Koncrete.
Why did the Buddhist gorilla get locked out of his monastery?
He forgot his monk-key
What did the gorilla wear when he was cooking in the kitchen?
An ape-ron
Did you hear about the gorilla with a screw loose?
He needed to use a money wrench to tighten it.
Q. What happens when a gorilla has a melt down?
A. He goes absolutely bananas!
Q. What does the alpha gorilla call his first wife?
A. His prime mate.
Where do the monkeys melt their cheese?
Under the gorilla.
Q. Why couldn't the gorilla run in the marathon?
A. Because he's not part of the human race!
Which technique does a Gorilla borrow from another animal when it gets romantic? The bear hug!
How did Gertie Gorilla win the beauty contest? She was the beast of the show!
Q. Where did the gorilla like to go sailing?
A. The Chimpan-Sea
Why do gorillas have really big fingers?
Because they have really big nostrils!
What is the first thing that gorillas learn at kindergarten?
Apey Cee's?
Why did the gorilla cross the road? He had to take care of some monkey business.
Q. What is a gorilla's favorite toy?
A. A bab-boom-orang.
Why did the gorilla have to visit the vet?
He wasn't peeling well
Why was there a troop of gorillas protesting outside the biscuit factory?
They wanted to stop the production of animal crackers.
What do you call a gorilla with no arms?
An ape-utee
Q. Where do lady gorillas go for a wild weekend night out?
A. Chimpendale's.
Why don't gorillas vote?
They're ape-political.