What do you call a gorilla who has been locked up in prison?
A kong-vict
Q. Why was the blonde disappointed after her visit to an apiary?
A. There weren't any gorillas there. DUH!
Why wasn't King Kong able to climb to the top of the Empire State Building?
He couldn't quite fit in the elevator.
Q. What is a gorilla's favorite holiday?
A. Ape-ril Fools Day!
What do you call a white skinned gorilla?
Honkey Kong.
Q. Why do educated gorillas like the numbers 1, 3, 5, 7, 11 and 13?
A. 'Cause they're prime apes.
Q. Why did the gorilla cross the road?
A. To get to the monkey biz on the other side.
What is a gorillas second favourite fruit to eat behind bananas?=
Ape-ricots
What is a gorillas favourite ice cream flavour.
Chocolate chimp.
Q. Where do gorillas get their gossip?
A. From the grapevine.
What's the best time of year to see gorillas in the wild? Ape-ril.
What do you call a gorilla with no arms?
An ape-utee
Where do gorillas keep their beehives?
Apeiaries.
Where do the monkeys melt their cheese?
Under the gorilla.
What do you get if you cross a talking parrot with a gorilla?
I am not sure but if he says something you better damn well listen.
My friend, who's a geneticist and a rapper crossed a gorilla with an orang utan
That's his new mixed ape.
Q. Why was the lady baboon so atrracted to the big gorilla?
A. 'Cause he had s*x ape-peal.
Why did the Buddhist gorilla get locked out of his monastery?
He forgot his monk-key
Q. What do they call the gorilla marathon runner who only wins when it's pouring outdoors?
A. The raining chimp-ion.
Where do apes like to cook their sausages?
On the gorilla.
Q. What happens when a gorilla has a melt down?
A. He goes absolutely bananas!
Did you hear about the 2 apes that kept fighting with each other?
It was gorilla warfare.
Q. Where do lady gorillas go for a wild weekend night out?
A. Chimpendale's.
How do you prepare a Gorilla sundae? Your start getting it ready Fridae and Saturdae!
What is the best thing to do if you notice a gorilla is sitting at your desk?
Find another place to sit.
Did you hear about the gorilla with a screw loose?
He needed to use a money wrench to tighten it.
What is just as big as a gorilla but literally weighs nothing?
A gorilla's shadow.
What do you call a gorilla in a cement-mixer?
King Koncrete.
Where do gorillas go to after work?
The monkey bars.
Did you hear about the girl who put gorilla glue in her hair?
Her stupidity knew no bonds
What do you call a large gorilla who appears to be in a bad mood?
Sir.
What did the Gorilla say to his friend when he called him back on the phone?
You-Rang-a-Tang?
Q. Why was the gorilla's jungle party so lame?
A. Because theyran out of chimps and dip.
How do you tell the difference between a rabbit and a gorilla?
A rabbit looks nothing like a gorilla
What do you call a gorilla with a machine gun ?
Whatever it wants to be called.
Q. What did the Aussie zookeeper say to the gorilla who was spying on him?
A. There's no need to pry, mate.
Q. Which book makes virgin gorillas blush?
A. The Naked Ape.
Q. Why did the girl-illa win the beauty contest?
A. She was beast of show!
My girlfriend and I saw an inflatable gorilla In front of a jacuzzi store
She asked me why they would do that for a jacuzzi store. I told her it was a guerilla tactic. She was not impressed.
Q. What kind of underwear do s*xy gorillas wear?
A. Chim-pant-zies.
Why should you never fight a Gorilla?
They know king kong fu.
Q. Why doesn't a big gorilla have to flush the toilet?
A. He scares the sh*t out of it!
Q. What do you call an entertaining gorilla eating a banana?
A. Ape peeling.
Q. What is a gorilla's favorite movie?
A. Planet of the Apes.
Q. Why are big gorilla turds always so stinking tired?
A. Because they're all pooped out!
What did the gorilla say after spending one month at te gym?
Geez, gain a little muscle mass, and everybody acuses you of steroids. As if eating too many bananas wasn't dopey enough!
I gave my wife that new gorilla glue chapstick...🦍💄
It left her speechless
What do you call a gorilla with a million dollars?
A gorillanaire
Which technique does a Gorilla borrow from another animal when it gets romantic? The bear hug!
Why did the gorilla cross the road? He had to take care of some monkey business.