What kind of deer make great weather forecasters?
Rain-deer.
What did the disappointed deer say? Oh deer!
Q. What did the mother doe name her new twin babies?
A. Bam B and Bam A.
What did the fawn say to warn her friend about the haunted house?
“Don’t go deer!”
What did the deer say to his sulky friend?
“Buck up!”
Q. How do the doe and stag open the entry to their vacation cabin in the woods?
A. They just turn the deer knob.
Why was the actress scared of the deer?
She had stag fright.
Q. What can a buck take after a night of drinking at a stag party?
A. Elk-a-seltzer.
Q. Which game do hunters go after first?
A. The nearest and the deerest.
Q. What is another name for elk diarrhea?
A. Chocolate Moose.
What did the big stag deer say to the hunter?
“Buck off, man!”
What did the weather reporter say to his wife?
“I hope it doesn’t rain, deer!”
Q. Which kind of cheese is made fom deer milk?
A. Moose-erella.
What is the difference between a deer nut and a beer nut?
“A beer nut is often more than a buck but a deer nut is always under a buck.”
Did you hear about the generous and kind deer? She had a hart of gold!
Q. Where are deceased deer laid to rest?
A. In a moose-oleum.
Why did the hunter miss his mark?
He was not aiming deerectly for it.
What cheesy dip do deer love to eat?
Fawn-due.
What did the deer tell his buddy before he took a test?
“Good buck!”
Q. Why was the stag thrown in the army brig?
A. Due to deer-eliction of duty.
Q. Which sweet dessert is banned from the menu at the Deer Cafe?
A. Chocolate Moose.
What kind of money does deer use?
“Bucks!”
Q. Which deer prison is escape proof?
A. Elk-atraz.
When we cross a deer and a mouse, what would we get?
“Mickey Moose!”
Why did the deer go for a run?
To doe off some steam.
What do you get when you cross Bambi with a ghost?
Bamboo.
Why did the deer go to the spa?
“To doe off some steam!”
What’s a buck’s least favorite sandwich bread?
Sour doe.
What did the deer’s mother say to her daughter on her birthday?
“I remember the day you were fawn!”
What does a deer hang on its Christmas tree?
“Horn – aments.”
What do you call a deer with hooves in his ears?
Anything you want — he can’t hear you.
What did the deer say to each other when they were trying to solve a difficult problem? This is such a deer-lemma!
What did the baby deer say to his friend?
“I’m so fawn-d of you!”
What was the motto of the unique deer? Deer to be different!
What did the deer say when she wanted to be left alone?
“Doe away!”
What is a deer’s favorite place to get breakfast?
Dunkin’ Doe-nuts!
What kind of diet did the deer go on when she was trying to lose weight?
A non-deery diet.
What did the deer say to his funny friend? You’re deer-larious!
What does a doe stripper at a stag party take off?
A. Everything but her un-deer-wear.
What do teenage deer do at slumber parties?
Truth or deer.
Q. What does a doe say When something very unexpected happens?
A. Oh, Deer God!
Q. How do you start a letter written to Sears Roebuck?
A. Deer Sirs..
What did the fawn who wanted to be a child forever say?
“I don’t want to doe up!”
What did the deer say after she saw her Amazon bill?
“I spent too much doe!”
What do you call a deer that can write with both hands?
Bambi-dextrous.
Q. Where do Midwest does prefer to give birth?
A. Deerborn, Michigan.
What does a deer call her boyfriend?
Cari-boo.
It’s raining cats and dogs today - I just hope it doesn’t rain deer!
What did the deer order to drink at the bar?
Ice cold deer.
What is the deer’s favorite food group?
“Deer-y products!”