What does a doe stripper at a stag party take off?
A. Everything but her un-deer-wear.
What did the deer’s mother say to her daughter on her birthday?
“I remember the day you were fawn!”
Q. What's on display at the Canadian Moose Museum?
A. Mod deer 'n art.
What did the reindeer dad tell his son?
Deer to be different!
Q. Which sweet dessert is banned from the menu at the Deer Cafe?
A. Chocolate Moose.
Q. Where can you view sculptures and paintings created by deer?
A. At the art moose-seum.
Q. What can a buck take after a night of drinking at a stag party?
A. Elk-a-seltzer.
Q. Which Greek eggplant dish do deer really eat up?
A. Moose-aka.
What do you call a deer with hooves in his ears?
Anything you want — he can’t hear you.
Q. Who walks around the suburbs trying to sell venison meat?
A. A deer-to-door salesmant.
What did the deer say after he finished eating?
“That was deer-licious!”
Q. Which deer was a fascist dictator?
A. Moose Al Ini.
Did Rudolph go to school?
No, he was elf taught!
Why did the deer cross the road?
To prove he wasn’t a chicken.
What board game do deer families always play?
Buck-gammon.
Q. Which deer was a fascist dictator?
A. Moose Al Ini.
How do you spot a deer behind you? With hind-sight!
What is a deer’s favorite place to get breakfast?
Dunkin’ Doe-nuts!
Q. What do you get when you cross a doe with a bull?
A. A deery cow.
Q. How do you start a letter written to Sears Roebuck?
A. Deer Sirs..
Did you hear about the generous and kind deer? She had a hart of gold!
What do we call a deer that wears a mask and refuses to tell its name?
“Anony – moose.”
Q. After the stripper is done, what happens at a stag party?
A. Deer-ty dancing.
What kind of deer make great weather forecasters?
Rain-deer.
Q. How did the wedding between the stag and the doe begin?
A. Deerly beloved...
What was the motto of the unique deer? Deer to be different!
What do you get when you cross a fawn with a bumblebee?
Bambee.
What did the deer say when her crush told her a joke?
“You are doe funny!”
What do teenage deer do at slumber parties?
Truth or deer.
What game do fawns like playing at sleepovers?
Truth-or-deer.
What is a deer’s favorite after-school snack?
“Doe-nuts.”
What does a deer hang on its Christmas tree?
“Horn – aments.”
How does a deer know what day of the week it is?
It looks at its calen-deer.
What does a deer call her boyfriend?
Cari-boo.
Why was the deer a good driver? He was great at using the deering wheel!
What did the deer say when she met her favorite celebrity?
“I’m a big fawn of your movies!”
What did the deer say when he left the barbershop?
“I feel like a million bucks!”
What did the big stag deer say to the hunter?
“Buck off, man!”
What was wrong with the deer’s smile?
He had buck teeth.
What did the weather reporter say to his wife?
“I hope it doesn’t rain, deer!”
What do you give a deer with an upset stomach?
Elka Seltzer.
What do you call an eyeless deer?
No-eye-deer.
What kind of diet did the deer go on when she was trying to lose weight?
A non-deery diet.
What did the deer say after she did her friend a favor?
“You doe me!”
What should you give a deer when it gets stomachache?
Elk-a-seltzer.
What did the large baby deer say when he met his favorite celebrity?
“I’m a big fawn!”
What is the most affordable type of meat that we would purchase?
“Dear balls because they are always under a buck.”
Q. Which game do hunters go after first?
A. The nearest and the deerest.
What does a deer do when it gets to its friend’s house?
Rings the deer bell.
What do you call a deer that can write with both hands?
Bambi-dextrous.