Q. Why was the stag thrown in the army brig?
A. Due to deer-eliction of duty.
Q. What does a doe stripper at a stag party take off?
A. Everything but her un-deer-wear.
Q. How do you describe a stinking filthy buck?
A. Deer-ty.
What did the deer say to his sulky friend?
“Buck up!”
Q. What does one teen buck say to oad another into doing something risky?
A. I double deer you!
Q. What did the witch get when she crossed a doe with a tornado?
A. A whirling deer-vish.
What do you call a deer wearing an explosive vest?
Bombi.
What board game do deer families always play?
Buck-gammon.
Q. Which square dancing step do stags enjoy most?
A. The Doe-si-Does.
What did the big stag deer say to the hunter?
“Buck off, man!”
Why did the deer cross the road?
To prove he wasn’t a chicken.
What is a deer’s favorite after-school snack?
“Doe-nuts.”
What game do fawns like playing at sleepovers?
Truth-or-deer.
What did the outraged female deer say to the mule?
How deer you!
Q. Which sweet dessert is banned from the menu at the Deer Cafe?
A. Chocolate Moose.
What did the deer’s mother say to her daughter on her birthday?
“I remember the day you were fawn!”
What does a deer do when it gets to its friend’s house?
Rings the deer bell.
It’s raining cats and dogs today - I just hope it doesn’t rain deer!
Q. What did they serve with nacho cheese at stag parties?
A. Deer-itos.
What cheesy dip do deer love to eat?
Fawn-due.
Q. Which Greek eggplant dish do deer really eat up?
A. Moose-aka.
What did the deer say when her crush told her a joke?
“You are doe funny!”
Why was the deer a good driver? He was great at using the deering wheel!
What does a deer hang on its Christmas tree?
“Horn – aments.”
Q. What do you get if you cross a devilish deer with an evil cougar?
A. A hell cat.
What did the deer say after prancing around a cloning machine for an hour?
“I feel like a million bucks!”
Why did the hunter miss his mark?
He was not aiming deerectly for it.
Where do deer get all of their coffee?
Star-bucks!
It’s the fawn of a new day! - said the deer happily after waking up.
What did the reindeer dad tell his son?
Deer to be different!
What does a deer call her boyfriend?
Cari-boo.
What did the deer say to his friend during their night in the woods?
This is so much fawn!
Q. What do you get when you cross a doe with a bull?
A. A deery cow.
Q. How did the wedding between the stag and the doe begin?
A. Deerly beloved...
Q. Where do Midwest does prefer to give birth?
A. Deerborn, Michigan.
What did the large baby deer say when he met his favorite celebrity?
“I’m a big fawn!”
Where do Santa Claus and his deers stop to have a coffee at Christmas?
“Star – Bucks!”
Did you hear about the generous and kind deer? She had a hart of gold!
How does a deer know what day of the week it is?
It looks at its calen-deer.
Q. Which Louisville race exclusively features buck and stag contestants?
A. The Kentucky Deer-by.
Q. What do biologists call an insane stag that's out running amok?
A. Deer-ranged.
What did the fawn who wanted to be a child forever say?
“I don’t want to doe up!”
When we cross a deer and a mouse, what would we get?
“Mickey Moose!”
Q. What do you get if you cross a deer with an Aussie Joey?
A. A buck-er-roo.
What is a deer’s favorite meal of the day?
“Deer-ner.”
What kind of deer make great weather forecasters?
Rain-deer.
Q. What did the mother doe name her new twin babies?
A. Bam B and Bam A.
What do we call a deer that wears a mask and refuses to tell its name?
“Anony – moose.”
What did Homer Simpson say when he saw a female deer?
“Doe!”
What does a deer say when it prays to the god?
“Deer God!”