Q. How did the wedding between the stag and the doe begin?
A. Deerly beloved...
What does the father deer say to the mother deer to show his love?
“I love you deerly!”
What do deer always use to clean their homes?
Comet!
What do you call an eyeless deer?
No-eye-deer.
What did the deer say after she did her friend a favor?
“You doe me!”
What is a deer’s favorite after-school snack?
“Doe-nuts.”
Q. What did the mother doe name her new twin babies?
A. Bam B and Bam A.
What did the deer say to his funny friend? You’re deer-larious!
Why was the deer a good driver? He was great at using the deering wheel!
Q. What did they serve with nacho cheese at stag parties?
A. Deer-itos.
It’s raining cats and dogs today - I just hope it doesn’t rain deer!
Why was the teenager deer a bad driver?
He didn’t want to use the deering wheel.
What is a deer’s favorite place to get breakfast?
Dunkin’ Doe-nuts!
It’s the fawn of a new day! - said the deer happily after waking up.
What should you give a deer when it gets stomachache?
Elk-a-seltzer.
What do teenage deer do at slumber parties?
Truth or deer.
What kind of diet did the deer go on when she was trying to lose weight?
A non-deery diet.
What Disney movie can a deer watch over and over again?
Fawn-tasia.
Q. Which kind of cheese is made fom deer milk?
A. Moose-erella.
Q. Which Greek eggplant dish do deer really eat up?
A. Moose-aka.
How do you spot a deer behind you? With hind-sight!
Did you hear about the generous and kind deer? She had a hart of gold!
Q. What do you get if you cross a devilish deer with an evil cougar?
A. A hell cat.
What do you call a deer that can write with both hands?
Bambi-dextrous.
What is a deer’s favorite meal?
Deer-ner!
Q. What did the witch get when she crossed a doe with a tornado?
A. A whirling deer-vish.
I want to start a deer breeding business…
But first, I’m gonna need about 5,000 bucks.
What do we call a deer without any eye?
“No – eye – deer.”
Q. What's on display at the Canadian Moose Museum?
A. Mod deer 'n art.
Q. Where can you view sculptures and paintings created by deer?
A. At the art moose-seum.
Q. How do you describe a deer joke with a screwed up punch line?
A. Bucked up.
What’s a deer’s favorite place to get ice cream?
Deery Queen.
What did the deer say when she wanted to be left alone?
“Doe away!”
What did the fawn who wanted to be a child forever say?
“I don’t want to doe up!”
What did the deer write in his journal every day? Deer diary.
What did the deer say to her daughter?
“Soon you’ll be all doe-n up!”
Q. Where do Midwest does prefer to give birth?
A. Deerborn, Michigan.
What was wrong with the deer’s smile?
He had buck teeth.
Q. Where are deceased deer laid to rest?
A. In a moose-oleum.
Why did the hunter miss his mark?
He was not aiming deerectly for it.
Where do Santa Claus and his deers stop to have a coffee at Christmas?
“Star – Bucks!”
What does a deer call her boyfriend?
Cari-boo.
What did Homer Simpson say when he saw a female deer?
“Doe!”
Why did the deer get braces?
He had buck teeth.
What cheesy dip do deer love to eat?
Fawn-due.
What did the baby deer say to his friend?
“I’m so fawn-d of you!”
Who puts money under a deer’s pillow when they lose a tooth?
The hoof fairy.
What did the deer tell his buddy before he took a test?
“Good buck!”
What board game do deer families always play?
Buck-gammon.
What’s a deer’s go-to ice cream flavor?
Cookie-doe.