What did the deer say to his friend who has slipping down the mountain?
Hang on for deer life!
What does a deer call a hunter?
“Doe foes.”
What did the deer say after prancing around a cloning machine for an hour?
“I feel like a million bucks!”
I want to start a deer breeding business…
But first, I’m gonna need about 5,000 bucks.
What do deer doctors specialise in? Hart surgery!
Why was the deer a good driver? He was great at using the deering wheel!
Q. Where are deceased deer laid to rest?
A. In a moose-oleum.
What do you think of puns about deer?
“I’m very fawn’d of them myself.”
What did the outraged female deer say to the mule?
How deer you!
What did the big stag deer say to the hunter?
“Buck off, man!”
Q. Which Louisville race exclusively features buck and stag contestants?
A. The Kentucky Deer-by.
What kind of money does deer use?
“Bucks!”
What did the deer say after she did her friend a favor?
“You doe me!”
Q. Which deer was a fascist dictator?
A. Moose Al Ini.
Q. How do you start a letter written to Sears Roebuck?
A. Deer Sirs..
What did the deer say when she met her favorite celebrity?
“I’m a big fawn of your movies!”
Q. Which square dancing step do stags enjoy most?
A. The Doe-si-Does.
Q. Where do Midwest does prefer to give birth?
A. Deerborn, Michigan.
It’s the fawn of a new day! - said the deer happily after waking up.
What does a deer call her boyfriend?
Cari-boo.
What is the difference between a deer nut and a beer nut?
“A beer nut is often more than a buck but a deer nut is always under a buck.”
What did the deer say to his sulky friend?
“Buck up!”
What did the deer’s mother say to her daughter on her birthday?
“I remember the day you were fawn!”
How do you give a deer a compliment?
“Fawn over him!”
What’s a deer’s go-to ice cream flavor?
Cookie-doe.
What is the most affordable type of meat that we would purchase?
“Dear balls because they are always under a buck.”
Why was the teenager deer a bad driver?
He didn’t want to use the deering wheel.
What did the reindeer dad tell his son?
Deer to be different!
Q. What do biologists call an insane stag that's out running amok?
A. Deer-ranged.
What does a doe stripper at a stag party take off?
A. Everything but her un-deer-wear.
What does a deer do when it gets to its friend’s house?
Rings the deer bell.
What did the deer say to his funny friend? You’re deer-larious!
Q. What does one teen buck say to oad another into doing something risky?
A. I double deer you!
Q. What did they serve with nacho cheese at stag parties?
A. Deer-itos.
Q. Which Greek eggplant dish do deer really eat up?
A. Moose-aka.
Q. How do you describe a deer joke with a screwed up punch line?
A. Bucked up.
What did the deer say when he left the barbershop?
“I feel like a million bucks!”
What does a deer hang on its Christmas tree?
“Horn – aments.”
What did the large baby deer say when he met his favorite celebrity?
“I’m a big fawn!”
Q. What do you call the stench that comes from antlered roadkill?
A. A foul o-deer.
If you see a deer without antlers acting crazy, don’t eat it without cooking it first.
Everyone knows you can’t eat raw kooky doe.
What do you get when you cross Bambi with a ghost?
Bamboo.
Q. Why was the stag thrown in the army brig?
A. Due to deer-eliction of duty.
How does a deer know what day of the week it is?
It looks at its calen-deer.
What kind of deer make great weather forecasters?
Rain-deer.
Q. What do you get if you cross a devilish deer with an evil cougar?
A. A hell cat.
What is a deer’s favorite place to get breakfast?
Dunkin’ Doe-nuts!
Q. What does a doe say When something very unexpected happens?
A. Oh, Deer God!
What should you give a deer when it gets stomachache?
Elk-a-seltzer.
Q. Will a sensible stag do something dangerous to impress a doe?
A. No, not even on a deer.