I used to own a raven. It could speak English, but the only word it could speak was "car".
The scare crow was out standing in his field, so he got awarded as the best employee of the year.
What do you call a noisy group of crows?
A caw-cophony!
There was a recent study showing that crows were hit a lot more by trucks than cars...
they came to the conclusion that this was because crows can warn each other by going "CAAAR CAAAR" but can't say "TRUCK TRUCK".
What do you call two crows flying together?
An attempted murder
What do crows read? Cawmics.
I said some stubtly racist stuff to a magpie
She was a victim of my crow aggressions.
Two crows land on a park bench.
They were arrested for conspiring to murder.
That raven is so stubborn at times, he just needs to crow up.
I thought of premeditated murder and a flash mob of crows came to my mind.
For waterproofing their nests, crows buy caw-king.
My friend uses a white crow to protect his farm from other crows
He calls it a rarecrow
Crows go, listen, perform, and enjoy live music, at cawnsorts.
Where do crows type? Crows type on cawmputers.
What happened to the pig who ate too fast? They got a ticket for running a Slop Sign.
The cawllarborne of the skinny crow was so pronounced.
How can you tell the difference between an English and French crow?
"PourCUAWWW! PourCUAWWW!"
A group of crows drooling over a pastry is called a-tempted murder.
What do you call a group of politically similar crows?
A cawcus
He has some good puns on crows, but he doesn’t have to keep crowing about it.
Why did the junkie adopt a one legged crow?
So he could get crow cane from his vet.
Ravens fans are so tough....they hang out in crowbars.
What is a crows favorite vegetable?
Corn on the caawb.
I had to carry a group of crows once.
It was murder on my back!
What do crows drink in order to stay awake? They drink cawfee.
A guy walks into a crow bar
It's a murder scene
Wondering what crows wear during Halloween, well, they wear caw-stumes.
Who was the criminal crow running from? The cawps.
On Halloween night a group of crows decided to enact a scene from the play Julius Ceaser, they were enacting the caw-nspiracy scene.
What do you call a group of crows who see food?
A tempted murder.
When buying crows for commercial use, always buy them in groups...
That way, you’re guaranteed to make a killing.
How will a crow with a cold fever sound like? Caw-ph, Caw-ph.
What kind of ice cream do pigs like best?
Hoggin Daz!
Crows organized a cawnfrences, to discuss the upcoming project.
Where do crows go to get educated?
CAWlege
After graduating from high school, crows go to caw-lleges for further studies.
What is a bunch of crows gathering money called? Crow funding.
The crow decided to dress up as Corvid-19 virus for the Halloween costume party.
What did the crow said when it saw a car coming? Cawr.
Crows go to get their shopping at Cawst Co.