Why did the cat run away from the tree? Because of its bark!
What do kittens wear? Dia-purrs!
What kind of cat works for the Red Cross? A first-aid kit!
Why didn’t the boy believe the tiger? Because he thought it was a lion!
What is a cat’s favorite type of bird? An e-mew!
Where does a cat keep its coins? In its purr-se.
What are the cat police called? The claw Enforcement.
Where do kittens learn to move around? On the catwalk
Why did the cat get fined? He was caught littering
How is cat food sold? Usually, purr can!
What is a cat’s favorite class at school? Hiss-tory!
What do cats build to prepare for war? Cat-apults.
Why are cats scared of trees?
Because of their bark.
What did the kitten say after a disaster? That was cat-astrophic
What do you call a cat that is scared of small spaces? Clawstrophobic!
What type of cats usually purr the best? Purr-sians!
Who wears red and brings catnip to sleeping kittens? Santa Claws!
What do cats read in the morning? The mewspaper!
Why did the cat decide to sleep under the car? Because she wanted to wake up oily!
What is a cat’s favorite song? Three blind mice!
Why couldn’t the dog say, “Ahhh”?
Because the cat got his tongue.
Why did the cat keep meow-ing? It didn’t want to be fur-gotten.
Which state of America has lots of cats and dogs? Petsylvania
Why couldn’t the cat finish watching her movie? Because she had it on paws!
What do you get if you cross a cat with a dark horse? Kitty Perry
What is a cat’s favorite color? Purr-ple.
What is a cat’s favorite book? The Princess and the Paw-per.
What did the happy cat say? Stay paw-sitive!
What do you call a cat that lives in an igloo? An eskimew!
What do cats wear to bed? Paw-jamas.
Why do cats not laugh at jokes? They take things too litter-ally.
What do you call a cat that has a hundred legs? A cat-erpillar.
What did the cat say when something bad happened? That’s un-fur-tunate!
What do cats do after watching a play? Give a round of a-paws.
Dogs can’t operate an MRI machine… but catscan.
Why did a person with an unspayed female cat have to go to court?
For kitty littering.
Why are cats such great singers? Because they’re very mewsical
What did the scientist’s cat say? I think I’ve lost an electron, I’m pawsitive!
Did you hear about the cat who drank 5 bowls of water?
They set a new lap record.
What did the cat say when it saw something scary? That freaks meowt!
What type of cat belongs to the baker? One that’s pure-bread
What kind of cats love to go bowling? Alley cats!
What did Spock say to his cat? Live long and paw-sper.
What steps do you take when you see a tiger running towards you? Big ones!
What do you call a cat that was caught by the police? The purr-petrator.
What do you call a large pile of cats? A meowntain!
What does a cat say when it gets injured? MeOWWW!
There is a rule that cats can shed hair on anything in the house… It is called fur-niture for a reason!
What is a cat’s favorite vegetable? As-purr-agus.
What happened to the vet that was accused of negligence? They were sued for meow-practice
What do cats eat on hot days?
Mice cream.