What did the kitten say after a disaster? That was cat-astrophic
What do you call a cat that is scared of small spaces? Clawstrophobic!
Why couldn’t the cat read a book? He was il-litter-ate!
What type of cat will keep your garden looking nice and tidy? A lawn meower.
What type of cat lives under the sea? A purr-maid.
If there were ten cats in a boat and one jumped out, how many would be left? None, because they were all copycats!
Dogs can’t operate an MRI machine… but catscan.
Did you hear about the cat who drank 5 bowls of water?
They set a new lap record.
What is a cat’s favorite piece of artwork? The paw-trait of Meowna Lisa.
What did the mom say to her kitten when she caught him slouching? Paw attention to your paw-sture!
What type of cat belongs to the baker? One that’s pure-bread
What’s the difference between a cat and a comma? One has claws at the end of its paws and the other has a pause at the end of a clause.
What happened when the kitten turned one? She had a birthday paw-ty.
I painted a picture of my cat’s feet today.
You could say it was a paw-trait.
Why was the cat not allowed on the computer? Because she tried to catch the mouse!
What does a cat say when it gets injured? MeOWWW!
What is a cat’s favorite TV show? The evening mews.
What do you call a cat that lives in an igloo? An eskimew!
What do you call a cat that was caught by the police? The purr-petrator.
What steps do you take when you see a tiger running towards you? Big ones!
What do cats eat on hot days?
Mice cream.
What do you get when you cross a tiger and a snowman? Frost-bite!
What did the lion say to his cubs when he was first teaching them how to hunt? Don’t cross the road until you see the zebra crossing!
What do you call a cat that gets what they want? Purr-suasive.
How is cat food sold? Usually, purr can!
What is a cat’s favorite movie? The Sound of Mew-sic.
Why did the cat get fined? He was caught littering
My husband was allergic to my cat so I knew I had to get rid of him… so I’m looking to rehome Gerry, he’s thirty-five and works in accounting!
Why did the cat invest in the stock market? He thought is was a good op-paw-tunity
What did Spock say to his cat? Live long and paw-sper.
What is a cat’s favorite deal? Buy one, get one furry.
What do you get if you cross a cat with a dark horse? Kitty Perry
What is a cat’s favorite type of bird? An e-mew!
What is a cat’s favorite song? Three blind mice!
What did the cat say when he ate the clownfish? This tastes a little funny!
There is a rule that cats can shed hair on anything in the house… It is called fur-niture for a reason!
What kind of cats love to go bowling? Alley cats!
What do you get if you cross a tiger with a kangaroo? A stripy jumper!
Why did the cat keep meow-ing? It didn’t want to be fur-gotten.
What kind of cat works for the Red Cross? A first-aid kit!
What happened to the cat that went to the flea circus? She stole the whole show.
Why can a leopard never hide for long? It’s always spotted
What is a cat’s favorite game to play with a mouse? Catch!
What did the cat say when something bad happened? That’s un-fur-tunate!
What is a cat’s favorite class at school? Hiss-tory!
What did the kitten do when she wanted to order something? She looked in the cat-alog!
Why did the cat run away from the tree? Because of its bark!
Why are cats such great singers? Because they’re very mewsical
What do you call a cat teacher? A purr-fessor
Why was the doctor’s favorite patient a cat? Because she has nine lives!
Have you ever seen a catfish? No, how did he hold the rod and reel?