Why did the cat run away from the tree? Because of its bark!
Where do cats go when they die? Purr-gatory.
What happened when the kitten turned one? She had a birthday paw-ty.
What is a cat’s favorite magazine? Good Mousekeeping.
What do you get when you cross a tiger and a snowman? Frost-bite!
What happened to the cat that went to the flea circus? She stole the whole show.
What did the scientist’s cat say? I think I’ve lost an electron, I’m pawsitive!
Why did the cat decide to sleep under the car? Because she wanted to wake up oily!
Why didn’t the boy believe the tiger? Because he thought it was a lion!
What is a cat’s favorite state of America? Connecti-cat.
What do cats read in the morning? The mewspaper!
What steps do you take when you see a tiger running towards you? Big ones!
Dogs can’t operate an MRI machine… but catscan.
Why can a leopard never hide for long? It’s always spotted
What do you call a cat that gets what they want? Purr-suasive.
What do cats eat on hot days?
Mice cream.
What do you call a cat that lives in an igloo? An eskimew!
If there were ten cats in a boat and one jumped out, how many would be left? None, because they were all copycats!
I painted a picture of my cat’s feet today.
You could say it was a paw-trait.
What happened to the vet that was accused of negligence? They were sued for meow-practice
What is a cat’s favorite kitchen tool? The whisk-er.
What do you get if you cross a cat with a parrot? A carrot!
Which state of America has lots of cats and dogs? Petsylvania
What did the kitten say after a disaster? That was cat-astrophic
What do you call a cat that is scared of small spaces? Clawstrophobic!
Why couldn’t the cat read a book? He was il-litter-ate!
What did the happy kitten say? I’m feline good!
My two cats had a fight today.
They soon hissed and made up though.
Why did a person with an unspayed female cat have to go to court?
For kitty littering.
What is a cat’s favorite game to play with a mouse? Catch!
Who wears red and brings catnip to sleeping kittens? Santa Claws!
What kind of cats love to go bowling? Alley cats!
Why couldn’t the dog say, “Ahhh”?
Because the cat got his tongue.
What is a cat’s favorite movie? The Sound of Mew-sic.
Why couldn’t the old cat see? He suffered from car-aracts
What do you call a large pile of cats? A meowntain!
What do you get if you cross a tiger with a kangaroo? A stripy jumper!
What do you call a cat that works at a printing shop?
A copy cat.
Did you hear about the cat that ate a ball of yarn? She had a litter of mittens.
Why are cats such great singers? Because they’re very mewsical
What did the cat say when he ate the clownfish? This tastes a little funny!
What do you call a cat that has a hundred legs? A cat-erpillar.
What is a cat’s favorite color? Purr-ple.
What is smarter than a talking cat? A spelling bee.
There is a rule that cats can shed hair on anything in the house… It is called fur-niture for a reason!
What type of cat belongs to the baker? One that’s pure-bread
What is a cat’s favorite horror movie? The Purrrge!
Why are cats bad at telling stories? Because they only have one tail!
What did the cat do to someone she had wronged? She a-paw-logized.
What is a cat’s favorite piece of artwork? The paw-trait of Meowna Lisa.
Where does a cat keep its coins? In its purr-se.