Why couldn’t the cat finish watching her movie? Because she had it on paws!
Why did a person with an unspayed female cat have to go to court?
For kitty littering.
What did the cat say when he ate the clownfish? This tastes a little funny!
Where do cats go when they die? Purr-gatory.
How is cat food sold? Usually, purr can!
Why did the cat decide to sleep under the car? Because she wanted to wake up oily!
I painted a picture of my cat’s feet today.
You could say it was a paw-trait.
What do cats wear to bed? Paw-jamas.
What do cats build to prepare for war? Cat-apults.
What did the happy kitten say? I’m feline good!
Dogs can’t operate an MRI machine… but catscan.
What did the kitten say after a disaster? That was cat-astrophic
What do you call a cat that is scared of small spaces? Clawstrophobic!
There is a rule that cats can shed hair on anything in the house… It is called fur-niture for a reason!
Where do kittens learn to move around? On the catwalk
Why do cats have minty breath? Because they use mousewash
Have you ever seen a catfish? No, how did he hold the rod and reel?
What is a cat’s favorite kitchen tool? The whisk-er.
What happened when the kitten turned one? She had a birthday paw-ty.
What’s worse than raining cats and dogs?
Hailing taxi cabs.
Who wears red and brings catnip to sleeping kittens? Santa Claws!
Why did the cat invest in the stock market? He thought is was a good op-paw-tunity
What do you call a cat that lives in an igloo? An eskimew!
Why did the cat keep meow-ing? It didn’t want to be fur-gotten.
Why didn’t the boy believe the tiger? Because he thought it was a lion!
What’s the difference between a comma and a cat?
One has the paws before the claws, the other has the clause before the pause.
What type of cat belongs to the baker? One that’s pure-bread
Why can a leopard never hide for long? It’s always spotted
What do you call a cat that has a hundred legs? A cat-erpillar.
What’s the difference between a cat and a comma? One has claws at the end of its paws and the other has a pause at the end of a clause.
What do you call a cat that was caught by the police? The purr-petrator.
What is a cat’s favorite vegetable? As-purr-agus.
What type of cats usually purr the best? Purr-sians!
What is a cat’s favorite movie? The Sound of Mew-sic.
What is smarter than a talking cat? A spelling bee.
Why are cats scared of trees?
Because of their bark.
What animal has more lives than a cat? A frog … because he croaks every night!
Why are cats bad at telling stories? Because they only have one tail!
What did the lion say to his cubs when he was first teaching them how to hunt? Don’t cross the road until you see the zebra crossing!
What do cats do after watching a play? Give a round of a-paws.
What do you get if you cross a cat with a parrot? A carrot!
What happened to the cat that went to the flea circus? She stole the whole show.
What is a cat’s favorite piece of artwork? The paw-trait of Meowna Lisa.
How did the kittens express their love for each other? In Holy Catrimony
What kind of cat works for the Red Cross? A first-aid kit!
What are the cat police called? The claw Enforcement.
What do you call a cat that works at a printing shop?
A copy cat.
Why couldn’t the cat read a book? He was il-litter-ate!
What is a cat’s favorite horror movie? The Purrrge!
What did the scientist’s cat say? I think I’ve lost an electron, I’m pawsitive!
What is a cat’s favorite type of bird? An e-mew!