What do you get if you cross a pig with a dinosaur ? Jurassic Pork!
What happened to the pig who ate too fast? They got a ticket for running a Slop Sign.
Why did the cat want to learn to fly?
She wanted to try bats.
What medicine do you give to sick ants?
Antibiotics.
Why don’t penguins fly?
They are not tall enough to be pilots.
After graduating from high school, crows go to caw-lleges for further studies.
The turtle had to cross the road in order to get to the Shell station.
I had a shell of a time when I attended the costume party as a turtle.
Did you hear about the snake who wrote a love letter to his girlfriend?
He sealed it with a hiss.
Why cant a mosquito stand on his feet?
because they dont have mosquiTOES.
Flamingoes have a special name for one of their numbers who has passed away. They call it flamingone.
What is a polar bear’s favorite cereal?
Ice Crispies.
What did the banana do when it saw a gorilla? The banana split.
What do you call a bear without any teeth?
A gummy bear.
Who do elephants get their Christmas presents from?
Elephanta Claus.
What's the worst part about being a beaver?
It's a lot of dam work.
Why did the tiger lose at poker?
Because he was playing with a cheetah.
What do you call a cat that lives in an igloo? An eskimew!
What does a tiger say to his friends before eating a meal? "Let us prey!"
Dad Bee left. Mama Bee calls out ...
Honeycomb home!
What happened when the pig pen broke?
They had to use the pig pencil.
What's worse than lobsters on your piano?
Crabs on your organ!
Their engagement is yet to be made offishell.
Where do kangaroos like to eat?
At IHOP.
Have you ever wondered which part of the flamingo has the most feathers? I found out once – turns out it’s the outside.
Who is the Easter Bunny’s favorite movie actor? Rabbit De Niro!
Why did the piglet yell at his sibling at the dinner table?
She was hogging all the food!
Why was the farmer angry?
Because someone got his goat.
What did the deer say when he left the barbershop?
“I feel like a million bucks!”
What side does the zebra have the most stripes on?
The outside.
On which day do tiger eat people?
Chewsday
How do you know carrots are good for your eyes? Because you never see a rabbit wearing glasses.
Why don’t monkeys play cards in the jungle?
Because there are too many cheetahs.
If you see a deer without antlers acting crazy, don’t eat it without cooking it first.
Everyone knows you can’t eat raw kooky doe.
Which side of a koala bear has the most fur? The outside!
Why do tigers always hunt and eat their prey raw?
Because they don’t know how to cook it.
What do whales like to chew?
Blubber gum.
What do you call a hamster in between two slices of bread?
A ham sandwich.
Why did the bunny cross the road? He wanted to prove he could hip hop!
Why did the piglet yell at his sibling at the dinner table? She was hogging the food.
What do you call luggage made of snakeskin?
Ex-hiss baggage.
Why do squirrels swim on their backs?
To keep their nuts dry.
What's yellow and black and yellow and black and yellow and black?
A wasp rolling down a hill.
Why did the T-Rex eat hamburgers? Because he is a meat eater!
What is the name of Santa’s rudest deer?
Rude-olph.
I saw a squirrel throw up today! It was nuts!
What do you call a holy squirrel?
A chipmunk.
What did the train conductor say to the kangaroo?
“Hop on!”
The baby beaver sang a song about the river in a video for his friends. He had a good flow.
A cowboy thought he had 100 cows but when he counted them there were only 97
So he rounded them up.
What do you call fifty penguins at the North Pole?
Really lost. (Penguins live in the Southern Hemisphere)!
Why was the baby ant confused?
Because all his uncles were ants.