Why did the dolphin blush?
Because it saw the ocean’s bottom!
I have no idea how to raise chickens.
I think I’ll just wing it.
Why was the cat not allowed on the computer? Because she tried to catch the mouse!
What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot!
What’s a horse’s favorite grocery store?
No-fillies.
What did the deer say when she met her favorite celebrity?
“I’m a big fawn of your movies!”
Q. Where are deceased deer laid to rest?
A. In a moose-oleum.
What do you get when you mix an elephant and a kangaroo?
Big holes all over Australia.
Alligators ask lots of questions, they'd make great interri-gators.
How did the close race between the rabbit and the tortoise end? It was won by a hare!
Q. What do biologists call an insane stag that's out running amok?
A. Deer-ranged.
Why did the duck detective get the key to the city?
Because he quacked the case.
Why do dogs run in circles?
Because it’s hard to run in a square.
How do you write a book about Bats? With a ghostwriter.
Did you hear about the gorilla that was from Vietnam?
He was a viet kong.
Where do most koala movie stars live? In Koalawood, Koalafornia, of course!
Why do ants work so hard?
They are all serv-ants.
Why did God create Yogi bear?
Because on his first try he made a Boo-Boo.
A tiger lost a storytelling competition recently as he has only got one tail.
How does spider man always come up with such clever comebacks?
Because with great power, comes great response ability.
Why did the police dog get promoted?
Because he was the scenter of so many drug arrests.
How do mares keep track of their boyfriends?
A stud book.
Any advice on getting a pet pig? Just be sure you get the pig of the litter.
What’s long, green and goes hith?
A snake with a lisp.
How do the crows in Texas greet each other?
Yee-caw
What do you call a pig with skin problems? A wart-hog.
What did the deer order to drink at the bar?
Ice cold deer.
How do you find zebra?
Look under zeshirt.
Why was the horse such a good dancer?
It perfected its halturn.
What do dinosaurs put on their pizza? Tomato-saurus
How do you get down off a horse?
You don’t, you get down off a duck.
Two snakes parted.
The first one said, “Fangs for the memories”.
Why do dinosaurs eat their food raw? Cause they don't know how to cook
Our flamingo colleague was leaving for a new job recently. We all told him to flamingo for it.
Turtles communicate with each other through shell phones.
Why was the beaver not arrested when he jumped into the Nile? Because he was a juve'nile.
Why don’t koalas like fast food? Because it’s too hard for them to catch.
Why are fish so smart?
Because they live in a school.
How do you know carrots are good for your eyes? Because you never see a rabbit wearing glasses.
If you have a parrot, it says a lot about you!
What's grey, beautiful and wears glass slippers?
Cinderella-phant.
What happened when the kid got confused with beavers and coypus in the exam? He said, " I otter know better."
What do you call a parrot with an umbrella? Polly unsaturated.
India is a very peaceful country.
Because nobody has any beef over there.
What is a cat’s favorite color? Purr-ple.
What sound does a llama’s doorbell make?
Llama llama ding dong.
What’s a snow princess’s glow worm’s favourite song?
Let it Glow, Let it Glow!
The inventor of mosquito repellent likely did not know where to begin...
I guess he would have to start from scratch.
What kind of horse would Bilbo Baggins ride?
A shire.
Why did the pony turn himself in?
He felt rem-horse.