What makes more noise than a dog barking outside your window?
Two dogs barking outside your window.
Why did the dinosaur cross the road? Because the chicken joke wasn't invented yet.
What kind of cat works for the Red Cross? A first-aid kit!
As soon as one beaver jumped in the river to search for his key, it got shocked, as the current was too strong.
I have no idea how to raise chickens.
I think I’ll just wing it.
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fishually impaired.
How do you catch a squirrel who's interested in ornithology?
Climb a tree and act like a nuthatch.
Q: Why do the tiger not attack the farm?
A: He was a little bit sheepish.
Every koala supports the idea of being able to defend themselves against tyranny. They believe in having the right to bear claws.
How do you know carrots are good for your eyes? Because you never see a rabbit wearing glasses.
What does the queen bee of every hive tell their workers to do?
She tells them to bee productive.
What do you call the worlds tallest mosquito?
Himalarya.
Did you know that the blue whale is so big, that if you laid it end to end on a basketball court …
The game would be cancelled.
You cross a turtle with a giraffe and a kangaroo and you end up with a turtle
neck jumper.
Do you think you know more parrot jokes than me? Toucan play that game!
What’s worse than one crocodile coming to dinner?
Two crocodiles coming to dinner.
What do you call a werewolf who doesn't know he's a werewolf ?
Unawarewolf.
What food did the Gorilla order when he went to France?
Ape Suzettes.
How can you tell which end of a worm is which? Tickle it in the middle and see which end laughs.
What’s it called when a bunch of pigs compete in athletic games?
The Olympigs
Why did the bunny bang his head on the piano? He was playing by ear!
You must be the Easter Bunny, because you’ve got me all egg-cited.
Q. What does a doe say When something very unexpected happens?
A. Oh, Deer God!
What’s small, furry and slightly purple? A koala holding its breath!
How will a crow with a cold fever sound like? Caw-ph, Caw-ph.
What does a deer say when it prays to the god?
“Deer God!”
Why couldn’t the pig tie his shoelaces? He was too ham-fisted.
Why had the beaver left the pond? He thought it was too shallow.
How can you tell if you are looking at a police glow worm? it has a blue light.
What do grizzlies use in the shower?
Bear conditioner.
What is a beaver's most favorite drama series ever? Riverdale.
What do you call an otter with a carrot in each ear? Anything you want as he can't hear you!
What is a baby parrot's favourite game? Beak-a-boo!
Why did the beaver cross the river? To get to the other side of the river.
Why do people like working at the Red Lobster?
It helps them get out of their shell.
Elephants will toil all day, and they work for peanuts.
What happens when a Mexican gets to the worm? He passes out.
How do fish get from place to place while playing golf?
With a golf carp,
What did the dog say to its fleas?
Stop bugging me
Where do penguins go to the movies?
At the dive-in!
Why are flamingos such good patients?
They’re used to wading.
Where do you get frog's eggs?
At the spawn shop.
Q. Which Louisville race exclusively features buck and stag contestants?
A. The Kentucky Deer-by.
A group of crows is usually called a 'murder.' Technically, it's only a manslaughter unless there is probable caws.
What do bees call wasps?
Wanna-bees.
Q: What did the sign for the party for beavers say?
A: Beaver or be square.
My fat parrot escaped from its cage... To be honest, it's a weight off my shoulders!
What do whales do when they get angry?
They blow up and then let off steam.
How do lions greet people?
"Pleased to eat you!"
What did the deer say to her daughter?
“Soon you’ll be all doe-n up!”