What do you call an ant with five pairs of eyes?
Ant-ten-eye.
Q: What time is it when a tiger walks into the room?
A: Time to get out of the room.
Why can’t you trust snakes?
They speak with forked tongues.
Where did the deer go to fix its tail?
The re-tail shop.
Hannibal crossed the Alps because it was safer than crossing the elephants.
Why did the bunny bang his head on the piano? He was playing by ear!
What do you call a cold, angry pig? A ham-brr-grr.
What do you call a pig that drives around recklessly?
A road hog.
What do you call an alligator in a vest? An investigator.
Q. What do gorillas and big apes do to make each other laugh?
A. They tell punny jokes about humans!
What did the llama say to the grass?
“Nice gnawing you!”
What do you call a shrimp hit by a car?
Road krill.
What do horses use to eat?
Breastplates.
What can one parrot do?
Not as much as toucan.
What did Papa Pig shout at his kids in the car?
“Stop swining! We’re nearly there.”
Being shellfless entails volunteering at the relief center during disaster.
Q. Why are big gorilla turds always so stinking tired?
A. Because they're all pooped out!
Flamingos can be a bit of a daring bunch. In fact, they always fly by the seat of their pants.
What does Harry Potter use when sealing packages?
His Parceltongue.
Why are cats scared of trees?
Because of their bark.
What do you call a greedy ant?
An anteater.
What did the river say to the beaver? You look so tide'y.
What do you call a royal goat wearing denim?
Billy Jean King.
What does an alligator do when he loses his tail?
It goes to a re-tail store.
Who gives crocodiles presents on Christmas?
Santa Jaws!
What do penguins sing at a birthday party?
Freeze a Jolly Good Fellow.
Why did it take the teen pig so long to get ready for school in the morning?
She was very piggy when it comes to choosing what to wear!
What do you call a Spanish goat with no hind legs?
Gracias.
What dinosaur is always sad? Cryalotosaurus
What do you get when you cross a frog with a rabbit?
A bunny ribbit.
My brother was trampled to death by a flock of sheep.
May he rest in fleece.
What do you get when you cross a chicken and a four-leaf clover?
The Cluck o’the Irish!
What is it when one cow spies on another cow?
A steak out.
What's more amazing than a talking turkey? A spelling bee!
A priest, a rabbit and a deacon walk into a blood bank.
"I think I might be a type o." said the rabbit.
How do penguins drink?
Out of beak-ers!
What do chickens grow on?
Eggplants.
What is a three toed sloth's favorite kind of chip?
Fritos.
What do you call a group of chickens clucking in unison?
A Hensemble.
What did Shakespeare say when he was angry with his Dalmatian?
Out, out, damned spot.
Why should you never throw a snake like a boomerang?
Because it’ll come back to bite you.
What did the pig say to his friend who had been cheated upon?
Please don't go bacon this relationship.
Why did the bear quit his second job?
Because he needed some koalaty time with his family.
Why don't crabs give birthday presents?
Because they're just shellfish.
What did one crow say to the other after the party?
We were raven.
A lion would never cheat on its wife.
But a Tiger wood.
Q: Which U.S. state do tigers like the most?
A: Maine.
A Zebra said to a Lion “Let’s swap roles for a while."
The Lion said “ I’m game!”.
Scientists transformed a tiger into a horse.
Don't worry, it's in a stable condition.
How does an octopus go to war?
Well armed.