What did the mouse say when his friend broke his front teeth?
Hard cheese!
What do you call a Pig with three eyes?
Piiig.
Did you hear about the rich rabbit? He was a millionhare!
Why was the crab embarrassed?
Because the sea weed.
What do chickens grow on?
Eggplants.
What’s black and white and red all over?
A sunburned panda.
What happened when the bat swallowed the alarm-clock?
She turned into a ding-bat.
Crowing, crowing, gone.
How do you make a goldfish old?
Take away the “G”!
Why was the mother rattlesnake sad?
The time had come for her children to strike out on their own.
Crows organized a cawnfrences, to discuss the upcoming project.
What did the pitcher tell the bat? Batter-up.
What noise does a gorilla’s doorbell make?
King Kong
Why can't you hear a pterodactyl using the bathroom? Because the 'p' is silent
What’s black and white, black and white, and black and white?
A penguin rolling down a hill.
I tried asking some beavers to help me build my house. They didn’t give a dam.
Why did the tadpole feel lonely?
Because he was newt to the area.
What Do You Call A Clever Duck?
A wise quacker
What is the camels’ favorite nursery rhyme?
Humpty dumpty.
Q. Why couldn't the gorilla run in the marathon?
A. Because he's not part of the human race!
What did the panda say when he was forced out of his natural habitat?
This is un-bear-able.
What do you can an ant scientist?
Albert Antstein.
What do you call a fish that floats on the surface?
Bob.
What’s the coldest fish in the sea?
A blue whale!
Q. Which deer was a fascist dictator?
A. Moose Al Ini.
What do you call two crows flying together?
An attempted murder
What birds like to write?
Penguins!
What did the dog say to its fleas?
Stop bugging me
Who did the horse ask to be his second wife?
A manewer model.
Why did the dinosaur paint her toenails red? So she could hide in the strawberry patch!
Where do crows go to get educated?
CAWlege
Q. What does the alpha gorilla call his first wife?
A. His prime mate.
I threw water on a flamingo the other day
Now it's just an O.
When he was chewing the skeleton, the wolf got to a point and laughed. I guess that was the funny bone.
Scientists transformed a tiger into a horse.
Don't worry, it's in a stable condition.
Flamingos are pretty good at ideas… They have a lot of experience with formation.
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur A lickalotopis
What did the bus driver say to the frog?
Hop on.
Did you hear about the extremely serious gorilla?
He didn't monkey around.
What vehicle does T-Rex use to go from planet to planet? A Dinosaucer
Why did the T-Rex eat hamburgers? Because he is a meat eater!
Went on a walk today. Had a couple of crows following me around. I'm pretty sure I have the corvid.
How do mice celebrate when they move home? With a mouse warming party!
Why are some fish at the bottom of the ocean?
Because they dropped out of the school.
Why did the Archaeopteryx get the most worms?
Because he was an early bird.
When it’s raining, a turtle goes to a shell-ter.
Q: How does a tiger stop a video?
A: By pressing paws.
The hotel said NO DOGS ALLOWED.
I guess it was a little too paw-sh.
What type of cats usually purr the best? Purr-sians!
What did the deer say to his friend during their night in the woods?
This is so much fawn!