What type of dog is best at timekeeping?
A watch dog.
Why do people hate bee puns?
Because they don’t want to beelieve they are good
Where do bats go to gamble?
Bat-lantic City.
What do you get if you cross a bat with a ball?
A home run.
What do llamas always reply when you thank them?
No probllama.
What kind of pole is short and floppy?
A tadpole.
What would bears be without bees?
Ears.
What fruit do vampire bats like the best?
Neck-tarines.
Experts suggest that the crows flying beak first into windows at a horrifying speed comit a murder suicide.
What does a koala do before making any kind of appointment? He always checks his koalander.
Dad Bee left. Mama Bee calls out ...
Honeycomb home!
Why would a horse make a good president?
They know how to lead.
What does the winged horse do after it goes to the bathroom?
Pegaflushes.
What do you call a rubber bumper on a yacht?
A shark absorber.
What's yellow and black and yellow and black and yellow and black?
A wasp rolling down a hill.
What did the bat do when she did not know the answer in class?
She winged it.
If you see a deer without antlers acting crazy, don’t eat it without cooking it first.
Everyone knows you can’t eat raw kooky doe.
What do a dog and a cell phone have in common?
They both have collar ID.
What do you call an illegally parked frog?
Toad.
How do you plan to shell-ebrate the New Year?
What kind of music do goats listen to?
Baaa-ch!
What kind of dinosaur can you ride in a rodeo? A Bronco-saurus!
Why did the bees go on strike? Because they wanted more honey and shorter working flowers.
Where do otters come from?
Otter Space.
What kind of shoes do frogs wear?
Open toad sandals.
What did the Easter bunny say to the carrot?It’s been nice gnawing you.
The next round the wolf showed up at the butchery, he was arrested. This is because he was being tracked by the police for chop lifting.
What do you call a lazy baby kangaroo?
A pouch potato.
Why did the mouse eat a candle?
For some light refreshment!
What did one crow say to the other after the party?
We were raven.
Before the Koalaville basketball team can play for the national championship, they have to make it through the koalafying rounds.
Why are dinosaurs no longer around? Because their eggs stink.
Did you here about the croc with a serious drug addiction?
It was a crackodile.
Two goats are married, living on a farm. Billy Goat says, "I really want children. Let's make some babies."
Betty Goat responds, "Heck no. No baby goats for me..."
"I'm not kidding."
My pet turtle died.
I'm not upset - just shell-shocked.
What is a cat’s favorite type of water? Purr-ified!
What do you call a fish with two knees? A two-knee-fish!
Why couldn’t the equestrian find the carrots? They were down by the bay.
What do racehorses eat?
Fast food.
When do chickens go to bed?
Half past hen!
These puns are turtle-y hilarious.
Why should you never ever play texas hold'em with a crocodile?
You will literally lose every hand.
What’s a spiders favorite barbecue food?
Corn on the cobweb.
How do you get two whales in a car?
Start in England and drive west.
Why did the koala bear eat so much eucalyptus? He simply couldn’t leaf it alone.
What did the dolphin say to the blue whale?
“Cheer up!”
What's a frog's favorite game?
Croak-et.
Where did the deer go to fix its tail?
The re-tail shop.
How do you find out how heavy a whale is?
Take them to a whale-weigh station.
Why was the snake mad at the jewel thief?
Because he wanted his diamondback.