Why don’t dolphin do well on school tests?
Because they work below C-Level!
How many dinosaurs can fit in an empty box ? One . After that, the box isn't empty anymore!
What’s an alligator’s favorite dip?
Croc-amole.
I told my parents I wanted to raise goats for a living, but I was only kidding.
What do rabbits like to sing? “Every bunny was kung fu fighting.”
The pun class we attended totally tortoise nothing.
How tall is a spider?
Eight foot.
Our local winery recently starting using a flock of sheep to keep the grass from getting too long.
At least that's what I herd through the grapevine.
How is a pig’s tail like 4 o’clock in the morning? It’s twirly.
Who brings presents for crows on Christmas? On Christmas? Santa Caws
I bought a pack of those animal shaped biscuits,
but had to take them back as the seal was broken.
What do yuppie sharks like to drink?
Jaw-va.
What's more amazing than a talking bat? A spelling bee!
What’s big and grey and wears a mask?
The elephantom of the opera.
What did the koala write in his Valentine’s Day card to his girlfriend? “I love you-calyptus”.
What are unsolved murders called when it happens in a society of crows? Murder mysteries.
What is the coldest type of horse?
A freezian.
Beat funny horse puns
What’s a horse’s favorite makeup brand?
Neighhhbelline.
Who’s the head of the penguin navy?
Admiral Byrd!
What’s a shark’s favorite movie?
The Shaw-shark Redemption.
What do you call an elephant with an aerial on his head?
An elephant-enna.
Why did the Gorilla fail its exam? He didn't have the ape-titude.
Who is a beaver's most favorite pop singer ever? Justin Beaver.
What did the banana do when he saw the monkey?
The banana split.
What’s gray, squeaky and hangs around in caves?
Stalagmice!
Why did the dog go to the bank?
To make a de-paws-it. But unfortunately, there was a mastiff line.
Do hairless goats wish they had mohair?
Who was the most infamous terrorist in llama history?
Osama Bin Llama.
What do you call a dinosaur with one eye? Doyouthinkhesawus
Crows, they just love sports, crow-quet to be precise.
How do you know if it’s too hot in the chicken barn?
The chickens are laying hard-cooked eggs.
A magician once said he could make a tiger disappear but only transformed it into a tabby cat...
It was a sleight exaggeration.
Why did the bee get married?
She found her honey.
What does the queen bee of every hive tell their workers to do?
She tells them to bee productive.
Why couldn’t the clownfish buy a house?
The fish could not buy a house because he didn’t have an-e-mon-e!
What kind of music do sophisticated kangaroos listen to?
Hopera.
How do beavers make a bouncy dam? Well, they use spring water.
Why was the mouse afraid of the water?
Catfish.
What do you call a dinosaur with one eye?
A do-you-think-he-saur-us.
How did the hammerhead do on his test?
He nailed it.
What do you call a blind dinosaur? adoyouthinkhesaurus.
What did the deer write in his journal every day? Deer diary.
What do the lady pigs say when someone leaves the toilet seat up? “Hoof-orgot to put the seat down?"
What is a cat’s favorite dessert? Chocolate mouse!
Crows go to get their shopping at Cawst Co.
How do lions greet people?
"Pleased to eat you!"
What do you call a snake with no clothes on?
Snaked.
I felt so guilty after I stepped on that worm this morning. You should have seen it, it looked genuinely crushed.
What do you call a pig that drives around recklessly?
A road hog.
What do vampire bats call their friends?
Blood brothers.
What do you call a fish with two knees? A two-knee-fish!