What is the biggest ant in the world?
An elephant.
What do you call a penguin in a shell suit?
An egg.
What do you call an animal you keep in your car?
A Carpet
What do you call an alligator that has all the other gators at the swamp crown around him?
A congregator.
What is a bear’s favorite drink?
Koka-Koala.
What do horses use to eat?
Breastplates.
Two male zebras in the Zoo started making rap-music.
They're called the Zbruhs.
What is the proper name for the ghost of a buffalo?
A booffalo.
If pigs learned to fly, would the price of bacon skyrocket?
skyrocket
What do you call a pig who does karate?
A pork chop.
Why is the snail the strongest animal? Because he carries a house on his back!
What do dolphins need to stay healthy?
Vitamin Sea!
I saw a pig with laryngitis.
He was disgruntled.
How do you get two whales in a car?
Start in England and drive west.
What does a Saudi bee call its bros?
Habibees.
What type of food do worms like?
Your Halloween Candy!
What do you call a dead flamingo?
A flaminghost.
Crows organized a cawnfrences, to discuss the upcoming project.
What soccer position does a pink flamingo play? Flamingoalie.
What did you call the cat next door 10,000 years ago?
A neighbor-toothed tiger.
Why do Otters swim on their backs?
To keep their nuts dry.
What type of dog can use a phone?
A dial-matian.
The mossbacks could not connect with the new developments, so the bill was hot
down at the senate.
Why are two parrots better than one? One parrot can't carry a coconut, but toucan!
What is a cow’s favorite lunch meat?
Bullogna.
Turtles keep on winning battles because they are perfect at shelling their enemies.
The chicken farmer died under mysterious circumstances.
The police suspect fowl play.
My pink bird friend got dumped a while ago. He was sad for a while, but now he’s singe and ready to flamingle.
Where do shellfish go to borrow money?
The prawn broker.
A French photographer and his friend from Czechoslovakia were visiting Australia.
Unfortunately, one day they got too close to a nesting site and were attacked and eaten by a pair of crocodiles.
The female ate the Frenchman.
The Czech was in the male.
Did you hear about the piglets who wanted to do something special for Mother’s Day?
They threw a sowprize party.
What fish are at the zoo?
Lion fish!
Why didn’t the koala bear get the job? He was underkoalafied. How did he fix this? By going back to koalage.
All the girls I meet keep thinking I’m a sheep.
Every time they see me they say “Ewe”
How do deer clean their feet?
Hoof paste.
What do you call an outlaw goat?
Billy the Kid.
Why did the cat get fined? He was caught littering
Of all the best pieces of wolf advice, this is my favorite, “stand fur what you believe”
What is a dog’s favorite type of homework?
A lab report.
How did the macho bee with eczema feel?
B-Itchy
What is a grandma sheep called?
A baaaa-nana
What did the mother turkey say to her disobedient children? "If your father could see you now, he'd turn over in his gravy!"
Who was the most infamous terrorist in llama history?
Osama Bin Llama.
What do you call it when a beautiful woman tries to trick you into giving her a pig?
A bae con.
What’s a deer’s favorite place to get ice cream?
Deery Queen.
What's an albino crow called? A caw-casian.
What do you call a dinosaur that eats it's vegetables? A.brocileasoarus
What do you call a dinosaur that left its armor out in the rain ? A Stegosau-rust.
What did the mouse say when his friend broke his front teeth? Hard cheese!
Crows go, listen, perform, and enjoy live music, at cawnsorts.