What is a dog’s favorite book?
Harry Paw-ter and the Sorcerer’s Bone.
Llama know if you don’t like these puns and alpaca my suitcase and leave!
The feeling you get when you think you have heard these cow puns before is known as deja-mooo.
If your piglet wants to be a wizard, there’s only one alternative: Hogwarts.
I sprayed a mosquito with mosquito repellent.
Now it has no friends.
How do rabbits travel? By hareplane.
Why do bees stay in the hive during the winter?
Swarm.
What did the librarian say to the beaver who wanted to read a help book? You can try by-rowing it.
How do the cool camels say hello?
"How you dune?"
Which birds are good at holding things together?
Velcrows.
Why don’t Penguins like rock music?
They only like sole.
How did the grizzly walk in the snow?
Bear footed.
Why would a horse make a good president?
They know how to lead.
What goes white black white black white black red?
A panda that falls from a cliff.
How does a 20-something pig hit on someone?
They invite them over to Netflix and swill.
Because they got turtle recall, turtles never forget.
What did the pitcher tell the bat? Batter-up.
What do you call an otter with a carrot in each ear? Anything you want as he can't hear you!
What is the proper name for the ghost of a buffalo?
A booffalo.
What do you call a sheep with no legs?
A cloud.
How does a penguin get around?
By icicle.
What do you call a lazy baby kangaroo?
A pouch potato.
What type of cat belongs to the baker? One that’s pure-bread
Who brings presents for crows on Christmas? On Christmas? Santa Caws
What do you call an immature goat?
A silly billy.
What’s a spiders favorite barbecue food?
Corn on the cobweb.
What do you call a fly with no Wings?
A walk.
Why are tigers striped? Because they never want to be spotted.
What’s the spiciest way to clean a horse?
With a curry comb.
Accidentally ran over a French seal today .
Phoque.
Q. Why are big gorilla turds always so stinking tired?
A. Because they're all pooped out!
What did the deer say when she met her favorite celebrity?
“I’m a big fawn of your movies!”
My pet parrot, Nickel, just passed away.
Now I have a Nickel-less cage.
What do you call a fish with a tie?
Sofishticated!
Why do cows think cooks are mean?
They whip cream.
What did the llama say when he found out he had been robbed?
“I’ve been fleeced!”
What did Tom get when he locked Jerry in the freezer? Mice cubes!
Q. Where are deceased deer laid to rest?
A. In a moose-oleum.
Why didn’t the boy believe the tiger? Because he thought it was a lion!
Evolution is so strange. Dolphins started off as sea creatures, then evolved to have legs, only to eventually return to the sea and lose them.
Kinda defeets the porpoise, don't you think?
How do fleas get from place to place?
By itch-hiking.
What do you say to a twenty ton dinosaur with headphones on? Anything you want. He can't hear you.
What does a kangaroo do when it gets Covid? Goes to the hop-spittle.
Why don’t dolphin do well on school tests?
Because they work below C-Level!
Why did the frog make so many mistakes?
It jumped to the wrong conclusions.
What do you get if you cross a bat with a ball?
A home run.
What do you call a three-eyed tiger?
A tiiiger.
What do you call a panda who’s lost his dinner?
Bamboozled.
Where do Russians get their milk?
From Mos-cows.
What steps do you take when you see a tiger running towards you? Big ones!