What's a frog's favorite game?
Croak-et.
What did Spock say to his cat? Live long and paw-sper.
What did the owl say to the judge?
I’m talon you, it wasn’t me.
Why did the Gorilla fail its exam? He didn't have the ape-titude.
What will you get if you cross a tiger and a watchdog? A terrified watchman.
What type of dog does Dracula have?
A bloodhound.
A crab didn't help his friend,
he's shellfish.
What did the pastry cook say when he was making the cake?
Bat-a-cake. Bat-a-cake.
What mouse was a Roman emperor?
Julius Cheeser!
What is a polar bear’s favorite cereal?
Ice Crispies.
What do you call a crab that throws things?
Lobster
What is a polar bear’s favorite snack?
Brrrrrittos.
What's a sheep's favorite art style?
Baa's Relief
What type of cat lives under the sea? A purr-maid.
What do you call a tiger who always gets the same grades as one other person? A tie-ger.
What did the librarian say to the beaver who wanted to read a help book? You can try by-rowing it.
What do pigs learn in the army? Ham to ham combat.
What do you call a man who is too big for an alligator to eat?
A jawbreaker.
Where do crabs invest their money?
A sea bank.
Why did the pig get fired? Insu-boar-dination.
Why don't gorillas vote?
They're ape-political.
Why are some fish at the bottom of the ocean?
Because they dropped out of the school.
What did the clean dog say to the dirty dog?
Long time no flea.
Why was the cow so scared?
Because he was a cow-ard.
Which city do hamsters live in?
Hamsterdam.
Why did the farmer put his cow on the scales?
He wanted to see how much the milky weighed.
Why was the horse a great editor?
She was very thorough bred.
My friend asked me how my pet crow communicates…
I replied, “Microwaves”.
What does a snail wear to go dancing?? Escargogo boots.
How do penguins make a decision?
Flipper coin.
What is it when one cow spies on another cow?
A steak out.
What do you need to know to teach a dinosaur tricks? More than the dinosaur.
What type of tool does a prehistoric reptile carpenter use? A dino-saw!
Who would win in a fight between a kangaroo and a zebra?
The zebra. Because he has so many black belts.
What do pigs do on the evening of February 14th?
They have a valenswines dinner.
What do you call a jellyfish on a plane?
A flightoplankton.
What happened when the kid got confused with beavers and coypus in the exam? He said, " I otter know better."
Why did they take Polly away?
He went crackers!
To whom did the squirrel go to seek out his fortune.
Nutradamus.
A woman bought a rooster, wanting to hear it crow.
However, it turns out the rooster was mute, so she was out of cluck.
What did the fawn say to warn her friend about the haunted house?
“Don’t go deer!”
What’s the first thing a gorilla learns in school? The ape b c’s.
What do you get if you cross a glow worm with a python? A 15 foot strip light that can strangle you to death.
How does a penguin make pancakes?
With its flippers.
If dolphins lived on land, which country would they live in?
Finland!
Why was the mouse afraid of the water?
Catfish.
Q. How do you describe a stinking filthy buck?
A. Deer-ty.
An elephant's opinion carries a lot of weight.
When you come across a lost wolf, the first greeting should be, “how are you where-wolf”.
What do turtles do when one of them has a birthday?
They have a shell-ebration.