Where did the hamsters invade the beaver colony? Hamsterdam.
A detective recently came into town to visit the new sushi restaurant
He heard there was a fishy business.
Where do Russians get their milk?
From Mos-cows.
What do you get when you cross ants with ticks?
All sorts of antics.
Why was the doctor’s favorite patient a cat? Because she has nine lives!
Why did the deer get braces?
He had buck teeth.
What’s black, dangerous and hides in trees?
A crow with a machine gun.
What kind of dog sniffs out flowers?
A bud hound.
What did the fawn say to warn her friend about the haunted house?
“Don’t go deer!”
The only difference between pea soup and roast beef is anyone can roast beef.
What’s worse than a giraffe with a sore throat?
A centipede with athlete’s foot.
A priest, a rabbit and a deacon walk into a blood bank.
"I think I might be a type o." said the rabbit.
The group of crows that attacked the lady was accused of murder, the cawps are still looking for the probable caws.
What did the goat farmer’s wife say to her husband when he was swearing on the job?
“Not in front of the kids!”
What's a goat's favorite organ?
A Kid-ney
What did the drug diller say to the duck?
Are you on quack?
What did the baby deer say to his friend?
“I’m so fawn-d of you!”
Sometimes we eat a crow while other times we eat Croatia.
What do you call a Spanish pig?
Porque.
Q. How do does and fawns fly from place to place?
A. In a deer-igible
What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?
A hippo is really heavy, but a Zippo is a little lighter.
Why don’t monkeys wear pocket watches?
Because they don’t wear pants.
What do you call a cold dog?
A pup-sicle. Better steer clear, especially if he’s fur-ocious… don’t want him to give you frost-bite.
Have you ever seen a catfish? No, how did he hold the rod and reel?
What do you call a Koala that can pick up an elephant ? Sir!
Coming to Theaters: The thrilling tale of a man who cooked biographical books like turkey on Thanksgiving.
*Baste on a True Story...*
What does a deer do when it gets to its friend’s house?
Rings the deer bell.
What do you call an and with frogs legs?
An antphibian.
There was a flamingo in our garden for such a long time, we started calling it a flaminstay.
What type of sandals do frogs wear?
Open-toad!
Dog to Waiter: Are there any bones in this?
Waiter to Dog: Yes sir, why’s that?
Dog to Waiter: Because I really dig them!
What do you call a kangaroo in Africa?
Lost.
A crow’s favorite nutty dessert is Pecawn Pie.
Where does the Easter bunny get his eggs? From an eggplant.
Beavers enjoy being in the company of a river because they go with the flow.
What happened when the kid got confused with beavers and coypus in the exam? He said, " I otter know better."
Grandma runs the kitchen like a turtle-tarian; give her some space there.
Why did the bat often use mouthwash? She had bat breath.
What is the similarity between a male deer and a beaver? Both have buck teeth.
What is a dog’s ideal job?
A barkeologist.
The local zoo just started a recycling collection program to support its mission: 'When you bring in one can, you can save Toucans.'
How can you tell if you are looking at a police glow worm? it has a blue light.
What has 6 legs, red hair, and flies?
No, seriously. This thing is scaring the heck out me.
Cows wear bells around their necks because it is moooo-sic to the farmer’s ears.
What is a dog’s favorite instrument?
A trom-bone
What do you get when you cross a banker with a fish?
A loan shark
Q. Where do gorillas get their gossip?
A. From the grapevine.
Did you hear about the owl who married a goat?
The had a hootenanny.
Why do flamingos fly south in winter? Because it would be too far to walk.
What does a monkey wear while cooking?
An ape-ron.