A beaver asked his fellow beavers to hurry up and said, "Water you waiting for, make haste."
What do you get when you cross a frog with a rabbit?
A bunny ribbit.
What do penguins eat for lunch?
Ice burg-ers.
What do you get if you cross an abbot with a trout?
A monkfish.
Why did the dog go to university? To get a pe-digree.
Of all the best pieces of wolf advice, this is my favorite, “stand fur what you believe”
Which are the best mathematicians amongst the snake family?
The adders.
Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.
Went on a walk today. Had a couple of crows following me around. I'm pretty sure I have the corvid.
What happened to the pig who ate too fast? They got a ticket for running a Slop Sign.
What do you call two kangaroos who live together?
Roo-mates.
Where do wasps go on holiday?
Stingapore.
Q: Why did the tiger eat the lamp?
A: He wanted a light lunch.
What did the dolphin say to its friend who wouldn’t stop lying?
Stop spouting nonsense!
Do hairless goats wish they had mohair?
What did the librarian say to the beaver who wanted to read a help book? You can try by-rowing it.
Why do snakes always measure in inches?
Because they don’t have any feet.
How do rabbits travel? By hareplane.
What did the married deer couple say to each other? I love you deer-ly!
A female sheep and a couple of aggressive birds are sitting on the veranda. What language do they speak?
Porchewegeese.
Why did the bat break up with her girlfriend?
She thought she was a pain in the neck.
What kind of music do sophisticated frogs listen to?
Hopera.
Their engagement is yet to be made offishell.
What do you call a dinosaur that eats fireworks? A dino-mite
How fast can a cave become vacant? At the drop of a bat.
What happened when the koala house party got a little too far out of hand? One of the neighbors koalaed the cops.
What does the father deer say to the mother deer to show his love?
“I love you deerly!”
My dog loves designer hand-bags.
So I got him a Poochi.
What do you get if you cross a snake and a pig?
A boar constrictor.
What does a koala do before making any kind of appointment? He always checks his koalander.
What’s a goat’s favorite musical?
Joseph and his Amazing Technicolor Dream Goat.
What is the only animal smarter than a talking parrot? A spelling bee!
What sport do wasps love?
Sting-pong.
What do you call an ant who won’t go away?
Perman-ant.
Why did the duck cross the road?
He was tied to the chicken.
A snapping turtle is a turtle that takes up pgotography.
What do you call a thirsty camel ?
A dry humper.
What do you call an ant from overseas?
Import-ant.
What did the Tyrannosaurus rex get after mopping the floor? Dino-sore!
What do you get if you cross a cat with a parrot? A carrot!
What do you say when you catch a bee?
Behold!
If you want to name a smart pig, name him Cunningham.
Wolfs are named after lots of things around and about them. For instance, lumberjack wolfs are known as timber wolfs.
Why did the chicken cross the basketball court?
He heard the referee calling fowls.
Why do gorillas have really big fingers?
Because they have really big nostrils!
Why do worms hate graveyards?
They keep bumping into skeletons!
Llama know if you don’t like these puns and alpaca my suitcase and leave!
What do you get if you cross a dinosaur with a pig?
Jurassic Pork.
It’s the fawn of a new day! - said the deer happily after waking up.
I finally found out why flamingos sleep with one leg up! If they had both legs up they would fall over.