The only things wolves have that no other animal on the face of the earth has are wolf cubs.
Why did the dinosaur paint her toenails red? So she could hide in the strawberry patch!
Never trust a flamingo unless you can be sure it has fully fledged ideas.
How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?
Squeaky clean!
A Zebra said to a Lion “Let’s swap roles for a while."
The Lion said “ I’m game!”.
Did you hear about the bird that couldn’t pass environmental legislation?
He was a lame duck.
What's a frog's favorite candy?
Lollihops.
Why did the penguin cross the road twice?
To prove he wasn’t chicken.
What Disney movie can a deer watch over and over again?
Fawn-tasia.
What does a Clydesdale say when you offer them a carrot?
“Of course, my horse.”
Why did the cat run away from the tree? Because of its bark!
Q: Why did the tiger cross the road?
A: To stop the zebra crossing.
If you had fifteen cows and five goats what would you have?
Plenty of milk.
Why did the blind seal get eaten by the orca?
Because he couldn’t see that whale.
How many mosquito's does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Only 2, no idea how they got there.
What do chickens call school tests?
Eggs-aminations.
What does a penguin where to the beach?
An ice cap.
What did the turkeys sing on Thanksgiving Day? God save the kin.
Who did the goats vote for as president?
Billy Clinton.
Which side of a koala bear has the most fur? The outside!
What is the poshest breed of dog?
A Cavalier King Charles Spaniel.
What happened when the two giraffes had a race?
It was neck and neck.
Q. Which Louisville race exclusively features buck and stag contestants?
A. The Kentucky Deer-by.
What did Cinderella Dolphin lose?
Her glass flipper!
Do You Know How Crabs Get Around On Land?
They Use The Sidewalk!
What is the popular computer game that crows play? Caw of Duty!
What is a naughty beavers' favorite type of wood ever? Knotty pine.
What do you call a crocodile that likes to bowl?
An alley-gator!
How much fur can you get from a dinosaur ? As fur as you can get!
Why can’t you breed a eel with and eagle?
It’s Eeleagle.
What do koalas do when they see social injustice happening in the world? They fight for ekoalaty!
What do cats eat on hot days?
Mice cream.
Why are glow worms good to carry in your Halloween bag?
They can lighten your load!
What do 99 percent of pigs ask for on their hamburgers? Piggles.
What is a bunch of crows gathering money called? Crow funding.
What do fish take to stay healthy?
Fish take Vitamin Sea to stay healthy!
I do find that flamingos don’t plan very well for the future… They’re too prone to putting all their eggs in the one basket.
What's invisible and smells like worms?
Bird farts.
What happens to great actors? They get nominated for an a-cat-emy award!
What do you get when two giraffes run into each other?
A giraffic jam.
Where did the duck go when he was sick? A:
To the ducktor.
What does a beaver from Philly drink?
Wooder.
What kind of dog sniffs out flowers?
A bud hound.
What’s the difference between a healthy rabbit and an odd rabbit? One is a fit bunny, and the other’s a bit funny!
Why didn't the frog park on the side of the road?
He was afraid of getting toad.
What did the clean dog say to the dirty dog?
Long time no flea.
When you cross a wolf and a monkey, you end up with a howler monkey.
If you mix a ghost and a cow together, you will create vanishing cream.
I want to start a deer breeding business…
But first, I’m gonna need about 5,000 bucks.
What did the fawn who wanted to be a child forever say?
“I don’t want to doe up!”