What kind of magic does a love-struck giraffe practice?
Neck-romance-y.
What dinosaur is always sad? Cryalotosaurus
What do you get if you cross a chicken with an alarm?
An alarm cluck.
How did the beaver build the insides of a dam using logs? He logged in.
Why are bunnies always tired in April? Because they just finished a March.
Why did the beaver stop cutting down trees?
The work gave him gnawsea
What do you call a lazy goat?
Billy Idle.
Did you hear about the bird that couldn’t pass environmental legislation?
He was a lame duck.
I had a job circumcising elephants.
The base salary wasn't great, but the tips were huge.
What breed of dog will laugh at any joke?
A Chi-ha-ha
Why did the mother cow give the sleepy baby cow a hammer?
He wanted her to hit the hay.
What do you call a rabbit who is angry over getting burnt? A hot cross bunny.
Beavers are the best at getting things done on riverbanks. They have their own waves of working.
What was the turkey suspected of? Fowl play.
What do you get when you cross a frog with a rabbit?
A bunny ribbit.
What's a camel's favorite part of a meal?
Desert!
How do pigs get to the hospital?
In ham-bulances.
What do you call a dinosaur that eats it's vegetables? A.brocileasoarus
What is a bunny’s motto? Don’t be mad, be hoppy!
For waterproofing their nests, crows buy caw-king.
Deja moo:
That feeling you've heard this bull before.
What does a snail wear to go dancing?? Escargogo boots.
What was the worm doing in the cornfield?
He was going in one ear and out the other!
Have you ever seen a fish cry?
No, but I’ve seen a whale blubber.
What do you call a SWAT team of alligators?
Gator-raid.
What is the difference between a panda and a polar bear?
About 1,000 miles.
What did the baby deer say to his friend?
“I’m so fawn-d of you!”
What is a deer’s favorite place to get breakfast?
Dunkin’ Doe-nuts!
What game do fawns like playing at sleepovers?
Truth-or-deer.
Wolves love shopping and they can literally die for. However, none of them loves the flea market for obvious reasons!
What do you call a turkey's evil twin?
A Gobblegänger.
An otter and an otter are in a car, who's driving? Animal Control
Why did it take the teen pig so long to get ready for school in the morning?
She was very piggy when it comes to choosing what to wear!
Who is a Penguin’s favorite pop star?
Seal.
My dyslexia has reached a new owl.
In what type of weather is the vet the busiest?
When its raining cats and dogs.
Did you hear about the short-sighted frog?
He had to go to the Hopthalmologist.
That alligator took great photos, he was a bit of a snapper.
How do ponies react when the opposing team comes on the field?
They horse-boo.
Why don't you want to sleep in the sheep pen?
It would be total bedlam!!
My brother was trampled to death by a flock of sheep.
May he rest in fleece.
What’s the number one complaint pig spouses have about one another? Too stub-boar-n.
What is a bear’s favorite soda?
Coca Koala.
My two cats had a fight today.
They soon hissed and made up though.
What did the little piglet want from the swine?
A piggyback ride home.
Did you hear the horse and the pig are dating?
They’re in a stable relationship.
Why do dogs run in circles?
Because it’s hard to run in a square.
Did you hear about the party at the Chinese zoo?
It was Panda-monium.
Q. Why are big gorilla turds always so stinking tired?
A. Because they're all pooped out!
What do you call an alligator in a vest? An investigator.