What kind of ice cream do pigs like best?
Hoggin Daz!
What do you get when dinosaurs crash their cars? Tyrannosaurus wrecks!
A bear covered in a bunch of crows gives the picture of a grizzly murder.
What does an alligator do when he loses his tail?
It goes to a re-tail store.
Tigers are like army soldiers. They both grow up to earn some stripes.
Alligators ask lots of questions, they'd make great interri-gators.
What do you call a group of lions partying on ships in Gibraltar?
A strait pride parade.
What kind of fish will help you hear?
A herring aid!
What did the dinosaur say when he saw the volcano explode? What a lavaly day!
What kind of bugs live in clocks? Ticks!
What kind of materials do dinosaurs use for the floor of their homes? Rep Tiles
I started dating a girl I really like. She's really into bees.
I think she's a keeper
When I was younger, I dressed up as a frog and robbed a bank.
That was the first time that I Kerm-itted a crime.
What do confused owls say?
Too-whit-to-why?
What is the deer’s favorite food group?
“Deer-y products!”
A beaver's tail makes them look odd.
But without it they would look otter.
What do you call a mosquito with a turbo?
A bug-hati.
What do you call an immature goat?
A silly billy.
What happens when fish start an addiction to worms?
They get hooked.
I have the heart of a lion
And a lifetime ban from the San Diego Zoo.
What’s a horse’s favorite grocery store?
No-fillies.
Why aren’t dogs good dancers? Because they have two left feet!
What’s black and white, has four legs and a trunk?
Two pandas on holiday.
What’s a hen’s favorite type of movie?
A chick flick.
What Do You Call A Clever Duck?
A wise quacker
What did hear about the two bats meeting?
It was love at first bite!
I'm giving away my legless parrot, no perches necessary!
Where does a lobster keep its clothes?
In the clawset!
I recently got two German Shepherds. Because
I wanted some paw-dy guards.
A saber tooth tiger would never blow anything up.
But a dino might.
Why did the chicken go to the zoo?
To get to the otter slide.
What do you get if you cross an alligator with a flower?
I don’t know, but I will not smell it!
Why did the elephant ask to borrow a suitcase?
Because he only had a little trunk.
A honey bee lands on a flower but is quickly kicked off by the spider living there. Perturbed, he flies away and lands on a different flower...
It was a cross pollination.
How does a kangaroo pick his favorite baseball team?
He jumps on the bandwagon.
Why are tigers striped? Because they never want to be spotted.
What did a duck say to the comedian?
You quack me up.
What is a cat’s favorite TV show? The evening mews.
What do you call a rabbit who is angry over getting burnt? A hot cross bunny.
Why are koala's so sleepy? Because you just got to be tired being so darn cute all day!
What planet does a seal live on?
EARFFF EARFFF EARFFFF.
What happens when an alligator drives a boat?
He becomes a navigator.
What is the favorite bread of a crow? Crow-issant.
Of all the best pieces of wolf advice, this is my favorite, “stand fur what you believe”
Calling my new dog “Shark” was a mistake.
I’ve been banned from all my local beaches.
Why was the horse a great editor?
She was very thorough bred.
What do you call a bat who gets a charge out of life?
A battery.
Which dinosaurs were the best policemen? Tricera-cops.
What do you call a royal giraffe?
Your highness.
What did the duck who learned physics say?
Quark, quark.