What do you get when you mix a sheep and a kangaroo
A wooly jumper
Where does a tiger sleep?
Anywhere he wants to!
How did the headless chicken cross the road?
In a KFC bucket.
What sound do 8 sheep make?
Octo-bah.
Why is it easy for chicks to talk?
Because talk is cheep.
What do you call a rabbit housekeeper? A dust bunny.
Did you hear the joke about the lumberjack, The sheep and the goat?
I wood tell ewe, but it’s a baaaaaad joke
What did the deer order to drink at the bar?
Ice cold deer.
Where did the dog leave her car?
In the barking lot.
How does a baby beetle get around?
In a buggy.
What is a gorillas favourite ice cream flavour.
Chocolate chimp.
What’s black and white and very noisy?
A panda with a set of drums.
What did the deer say when her crush told her a joke?
“You are doe funny!”
I personally think bunnies are ear-resistible.
What kind of shoes do frogs wear?
Open toad sandals.
What do dogs and Santa have in common?
They are both seen Dachshund through the snow.
Local restaurant has kangaroo loin and it’s actually pretty good
It’s been awhile since I had it, but I remember it being a little jumpy and has a kick.
Why did the tiger lose at poker?
Because he was playing with a cheetah.
How does a lobster answer the phone?
"Shello?"
A giant fly has attacked the local police...
Police have called SWAT team.
Why did the whale cross the ocean?
To get to the other tide.
Can you name 10 dinosaurs in 10 seconds? Yes, 8 Iguanadons and 2 Stegasaurus.
What’s a buck’s least favorite sandwich bread?
Sour doe.
Why do Dachshunds nap in the sun?
Because they’re hot dogs.
What’s another popular Christmas song that baby koalas like to sing? “Joey to the World”, of course!
What is a penguin racing driver’s favourite part of the car?
The Eggs-celerator.
What did the duck say when the waitress came?
Put it on my bill.
What is the best thing to do if you notice a gorilla is sitting at your desk?
Find another place to sit.
What's the most common form of owl-on-owl violence?
Drive by hooting.
There was a fight at the fish restaurant last night.
Two haddock got battered.
What happened to the pig who ate too fast? They got a ticket for running a Slop Sign.
What's more amazing than a talking bat? A spelling bee!
What do you call it when a marsupial tricks you?
A kanga-ruse.
Where do bats like to relax?
In the bat-tub.
I tried to keep a koala in my house, but the smell was just unBEARable.
Why did the mouse eat a candle?
For some light refreshment!
What do you call a penguin in the desert?
Lost!
A pig just won the lottery. What do you call him?
Filthy rich.
How about the stylish female crocodile, she's every inch a frock-o-dile.
What is an owl’s dream occupation?
Flight attendant.
How can you tell which rabbits are getting old? Look for the grey hares.
What do you call a shark that can’t stop singing “U Cant Touch This?”
An M.C. Hammerhead.
What do you call an illegally parked frog?
Toad.
How do deer clean their feet?
Hoof paste.
What is gray, hairy and lives on a mans face?
A mouse-tache!
What do you get when you pour hot water down a rabbit hole? A Hot Cross bunny.
What do you call a very smart bunny? An egghead.
I've just got a new job as a nursery rhyme cow.
I'm over the moon.
What is a parrot’s favorite game?
Beakaboo
How do you prepare a Gorilla sundae? Your start getting it ready Fridae and Saturdae!
Why is it a bad idea to get in a fight with a monkey?
Because they use gorilla warfare.