What is a sharks favorite kinda sandwich?
Peanut butter and jellyfish!
What is a koala bear’s favorite line in the movie “The Sixth Sense”? “Aussie dead people.”
Why did the dog go to the bank?
To make a de-paws-it. But unfortunately, there was a mastiff line.
Heard about the devoted beaver who crossed the turbulent river? He took a leap of faith!
Q. Why was the stag thrown in the army brig?
A. Due to deer-eliction of duty.
Why did the magician have to cancel his show? Because he just washed his hare and couldn’t do a thing with it.
What did Tom get when he locked Jerry in the freezer? Mice cubes!
What is the difference between a car and a bull?
A car only has one horn.
Flamingos are great at surfing the internet. I think it’s because they have webbed feet.
The pun class we attended totally tortoise nothing.
Why do psychiatrists study bats?
They want to learn about their hang-ups.
Did you hear about the croc calling the frog? He just croc-o-dialled.
Why are parrots the life of the party? Every day is their bird-day!
What do you call a chicken that crosses the road, rolls in the dirt, crosses the road again, and then rolls in the dirt again?
A dirty double-crossing chicken.
What did the kitten do when she wanted to order something? She looked in the cat-alog!
What do dogs eat for breakfast?
Pooched eggs.
Some people like to play croc-quet.
Don't worry, bee happy!
Did you know that the blue whale is so big, that if you laid it end to end on a basketball court …
The game would be cancelled.
How did the dinosaur feel after he ate a pillow? Down in the mouth.
What do you call a goat swimming in the sea?
Billy Ocean.
Just had Lobster Bisque for the first time!
It was souper good!
What did the snake give to his wife?
A goodnight hiss.
What happens to great actors? They get nominated for an a-cat-emy award!
The sweetest and punny name to call a pig is Mudpie.
Our lobster neighbors never give us gifts during the holidays!
They’re so shellfish.
Who does a fish call when his piano breaks?
The piano tuna!
Are Jellyfish sad that there are no Peanut Butter fish?
How do clams call their friends?
Clams call their friends on their shell phones!
Why did the chicken cross the road halfway?
She wanted to lay it on the line.
Why did the Beatles stop inviting Ringo to Thanksgiving?
Because he wouldn't share the drumsticks.
Where do cats go when they lose their tail? A re-tail store!
What do you get when you cross a rabbit with a leaf blower? A hare dryer!
What weighs 800 pounds and sticks to the roof of your mouth ? A peanut butter and Stegosaurus sandwich!
Each year, lots of wolves go treating in howl-o-ween.
Where do crows go to get educated?
CAWlege
What do worms leave round their baths?
The scum of the earth!
What do you call a turtle who takes up photography?
A snapping turtle.
The scare crow was out standing in his field, so he got awarded as the best employee of the year.
What did the worm say to the other when he was late home? Where in earth have you been.
When the pig had a quarrel with his wife, he ended up having a gilt trip.
When does a sloth go "moo"? When it is learning a new language!
How does a snake shoot something?
With a boa and arrow.
If you have a bee in your hand, what do you have in your eye? Beauty, because beauty is in the eye of the bee-holder.
What was wrong with the deer’s smile?
He had buck teeth.
Q: Why did the tiger cross the road?
A: To stop the zebra crossing.
What did the dolphin do to the woman who was rude to it?
Flipper off!
If dolphins lived on land, which country would they live in?
Finland!
What do ducks watch on TV?
Duck-umentaries.
Why was Pegasus such a good ballerina?
He was flo-wing.