What do you call a cat that works at a printing shop?
A copy cat.
Where was the dinosaur when the sun went down ? In the dark!
What do you call an ant who can see into the future?
Clairvoy-ant.
Our lobster neighbors never give us gifts during the holidays!
They’re so shellfish.
Why are parrots so loyal? They are a man of their bird!
Q. What's on display at the Canadian Moose Museum?
A. Mod deer 'n art.
What is a pink bird's favorite kind of dance? Flamenco.
What’s small, furry and slightly purple? A koala holding its breath!
What’s the easiest way to catch fish? Have someone throw it at you!
Why do grizzlies never look sad?
Because whenever there’s a problem, they just grin and bear it.
What did the grape say when the elephant stood on it?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
I don’t know why everyone is so upset about untraditional family structures, it’s been happening in the animal world for years. For example, all water buffalos have three parents.
One oxygen buffalo and two hydrogen buffalos.
What did one pig say to the other?
Let’s be pen pals.
Why was the dog chasing his own tail?
Because he was trying to make both ends meet.
How do deer clean their feet?
Hoof paste.
What do you call an ant that doesn’t get warm?
Coolant.
Why did the bunny say to the duck? You quack me up!
Q. Which Louisville race exclusively features buck and stag contestants?
A. The Kentucky Deer-by.
Where do bats get their education?
In night schools.
Why was the cow so scared?
Because he was a cow-ard.
Why are beavers only found in freshwaters? Because they don't like stale water.
Llama know if you don’t like these puns and alpaca my suitcase and leave!
What do you get when you cross a rabbit with a Spider? A Hare net!
Why did they let the turkey join the band? Because he had the drumsticks
Why did the rabbit like the adventure? It was a “hare-raising tail.”
A well-loved parrot died, and was digitally immortalized in a 3D rendering.
Polygon but not forgotten.
What did the deer say after he finished eating?
“That was deer-licious!”
What do you get if you cross Bossy with a vampire?
Dracowla.
What do you call a freezing bear?
A brrrrrrr.
Q. How do does and fawns fly from place to place?
A. In a deer-igible
Why are beavers so good in maths? They love log'arithms.
Where do penguins go to dance?
The snow ball!
Which condiment is a mouse’s favourite?
Mouse-tard.
What’s the difference between a crow and a chicken?
A chicken can crow, but a crow can’t chicken.
What happened when the bat swallowed the alarm-clock?
She turned into a ding-bat.
What is an Italian’s favorite type of dog?
A ciao ciao.
What do you call a dream when a vampire bat is chasing you?
A bat-mare.
What do you call it when you boil a water buffalo?
A mist steak.
Turtles keep on winning battles because they are perfect at shelling their enemies.
That raven is so stubborn at times, he just needs to crow up.
What do you get when you cross a Sheepdog with a jelly?
The collie wobbles.
How can you tell if a crab is drunk?
It walks straight
What does Spider-man become when he joins the circus?
an aracnobat.
What's green, green, green, green, green?
A frog rolling down a hill.
Q. Which kind of cheese is made fom deer milk?
A. Moose-erella.
What did the guard say to stop the horse from escaping?
Halt-her!
What is a dog’s favorite coordinates?
K9.
Why don't squirrels have any friends?
Because they drive everyone nuts.
How can you tell a vampire likes baseball? Every night he turns into a bat.
What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot!