What kind of fish do Penguins catch at night?
Starfish.
Zebras usually hold strong opinions. They are very black and white creatures.
What do snakes use to clean their car windows?
Windscreen vipers.
Old gorillas never die, but they do go bananas.
Two snakes parted.
The first one said, “Fangs for the memories”.
What position did the young vampire bat play on the football team?
Quater-bat.
What do you call a secret group of llamas?
The i-llama-nati.
What is a sharks favorite kinda sandwich?
Peanut butter and jellyfish!
What fish perform at the circus?
Clown fish!
What did the mom say to her kitten when she caught him slouching? Paw attention to your paw-sture!
What did the bacteria say to the bee to cheer it up?
Gram positive
Why do bears have fur coats?
Because they look silly wearing jackets.
What did the dolphin say to the blue whale?
“Cheer up!”
Why was the crab embarrassed?
Because the sea weed.
Who has large antlers, a high voice and wears white gloves? Mickey Moose!
What does a deer do when it gets to its friend’s house?
Rings the deer bell.
What did the beaver say when it saw it's home on fire?
Hot Dam!
An electrocuted turtle feels shell-shocked.
Kangaroos can grow up to six feet.
Most only grow two.
Why did they let the turkey join the band? Because he had the drumsticks
What did Papa Pig shout at his kids in the car?
“Stop swining! We’re nearly there.”
Every koala supports the idea of being able to defend themselves against tyranny. They believe in having the right to bear claws.
How about the stylish female crocodile, she's every inch a frock-o-dile.
Where did the hamsters invade the beaver colony? Hamsterdam.
What do you call a cat that works at a printing shop?
A copy cat.
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite season?
Spring.
What do you get when you cross a Sheepdog with a jelly?
The collie wobbles.
What did the monkey say when he cut off his tail?
It won’t be long now.
What do you feed a 700 pound gorilla?
Just give him anything he wants and then run.
What did the banana do when he saw the monkey?
The banana split.
People in Iran are scared of spiders
But in Iraq, no phobia.
I thought swimming with the dolphins was expensive, but swimming with the sharks cost me an arm and a leg!
What is the maggot army called? The Apple Corps.
Which flower is known as the most ferocious flower? A tiger lily.
Why is it cheap to feed polar bears?
Because they live on ice only.
What do confused owls say?
Too-whit-to-why?
What goes dot-dot-croak, dot-dash-croak?
Morse toad.
What do you call dogs who pay in the snow?
Slush puppies.
The crow decided to dress up as Corvid-19 virus for the Halloween costume party.
Why was the little bee sent to bed without supper?
Because he wouldn't beehive.
What do you get if you stand between two llamas?
Llamanated.
What is a pink bird's favorite dance? Flamin-tango.
The Beavers have the ugliest house in the neighborhood.
It’s a dam shame.
What do you call an immature goat?
A silly billy.
How do you know when your dog is lazy?
When it chases parked cars.
What is the favorite bread of a crow? Crow-issant.
Just a buffalo laying down, bisoness as usual.
Have you heard about that socially awkward chef that only cooks with snake meat?
I’m pretty sure he has Asp burgers.
Why did the viper, viper nose?
Because the adder, adder hankerchief.
How does a koala get from one place to another? On a gondkoala.