What do you call a group of dyslexic crows?
A redrum.
Why do bears have sticky fur?
Because they use honey combs.
What do you call two crows flying together?
An attempted murder
All the turtles wore turtle necks to the party.
Where do crabs invest their money?
A sea bank.
What do you call a dog who can fight?
A Boxer.
What’s a snow princess’s glow worm’s favourite song?
Let it Glow, Let it Glow!
Flamingo parents are really cute with their babies. You should see them playing Beak a Boo.
I asked a panda if he was my friend.
He said, “Just bearly”.
Did you hear about the gorilla with a screw loose?
He needed to use a money wrench to tighten it.
Why do dogs hate computers?
They can’t stick their heads out of those Windows.
What do deer doctors specialise in? Hart surgery!
It was reported that a tiger recently exploded in the forest fire. They say it was a Royal Bang-al Tiger.
Which dinosaur slept all day ? The dino-snore!
What did the Inuit say to to Englishman After he wanted some seal?
"I've got Nunavut."
What do married snakes have on their bath towels?
Hiss and Hers.
I told my wife that I saw a sheep pondering its place in the world.
She asked me, “Can ewe even imagine?”
What is a beaver's most favorite song ever? You made me a, you made me a beaver, beaver.
Why do dogs find it hard to work the TV remote?
Because they always hit the paws button.
When one of them have a birthday, turtles call for a shell-ebration.
"Dad, what's it called if I like both boys and girls," the buffalo said.
"I believe would be a bi-son," his father replied.
Why is it easy for chicks to talk?
Because talk is cheep.
What do you call an bat with a carrot in each ear? Anything you want as he can't hear you!
What do you call a dinosaur that's a loud sleeper? A Snore-a-sorus
What do you call it when a giraffe swallows a toy jet?
A plane in the neck.
Did you hear about the owl party?
It was a hoot.
How do you stop a bear from charging?
Take away its credit cards.
What did the deer say to his friend when he suggested a trip to the park? Good i-deer!
Why did the penguin cross the ocean?
To get to the other tide.
What’s another popular Christmas song that baby koalas like to sing? “Joey to the World”, of course!
What is an owl’s favorite Beatles’ song?
Owl you need is love.
How do snails get their shells so shiny? They use snail varnish!
What did the Easter bunny say about the Easter parade?It was eggs-cellent.
The cawllarborne of the skinny crow was so pronounced.
What kind of car does a mouse drive?
A mini van.
My son wanted a pet spider but they're to expensive.
I told him I'll get him one off the web.
Ever wonder how gorillas can be so strong when they eat mostly a plant based diet?
Cuz they don't monkey around when it comes to strength training!
What is a medieval owl called?
A knight owl.
Psychologist: What brings you here today?
Squirrel: I realized I am what I eat….. Nuts.
Why do penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they don’t have any pockets.
Why was the glow worm unhappy ?
Because her children weren’t that bright !
What do you get when you cross a turkey with an octopus? Enough drumsticks for Thanksgiving.
What’s it called when a bunch of pigs compete in athletic games?
The Olympigs.
What do you get when you cross a chicken with a Martian?
An eggs-traterrestrial.
What’s the super-confusing way that pigs say I love you? “I a-boar-you.”
How did the headless chicken cross the road?
In a KFC bucket.
Flamingos are known by a different name when they dress up to go out – they call themselves glamingos.
Why are crows so interesting?
Just beCAWse
Q: What does a tiger call an antelope?
A: Fast food.
What do you call a flamingo that flew into a wall?
A flamingstop.