What does an owl need after having a bath?
A t-owl.
Who makes dinosaur clothes? dino-sewer.
What happens when a hen eats gunpowder?
She lays hand gren-eggs.
What’s black, white and red all over?
A penguin with a sunburn.
An elephant's opinion carries a lot of weight.
What did the boyfriend mouse say too the girlfriend mouse family? Mice too meet you.
What do you call a bee that comes back from the dead?
Zombee
What do you get when you cross a rabbit with a Spider? A Hare net!
What does a chicken need to lay an egg every day?
Hen-durance.
What happened to the baby chicken that misbehaved at school?
It was egg-spelled.
Why should you never throw a snake like a boomerang?
Because it’ll come back to bite you.
Why was the horse sad she didn’t get the job?
She was flanking on it.
What did the snail say as he slipped down the wall? How slime flies!
What’s black and white, has four legs and a trunk?
Two pandas on holiday.
Which are the best mathematicians amongst the snake family?
The adders.
The truck load of tortoise that crushed caused a turtle disaster.
How did the sheep farmer become best in his field?
Shear luck.
What does a chocolate crow say? “Cacao!”
What’s an elephant’s favorite sport?
Squash.
Sorry seems to be the hardest word to say...
Unless you're Chinese. Then it's 'squirrel'.
Why did the dinosaur cross the road ? The chicken hadn't evolved yet!
I like you, you croc my world.
Which animal can hibernate while standing on its head?
Yoga Bear.
What sound does a turkey's phone make? Wing! Wing!
Did you hear about the pig who opened a pawn shop?
He called it “Ham Hocks”
Cows will never make the police force because they simply refuse to go on steak-outs.
What Do You Call Two Ducks And A Cow?
Quakers and milk.
The group of crows that attacked the lady was accused of murder, the cawps are still looking for the probable caws.
What Do Ducks Have With Soup?
Quackers
How did the pony get the bugs away?
It said, horse-shoo fly, don’t bother me.
Why was the penguin so annoying?
Because he was always fishing for complements.
Why did the chicken go to KFC?
He wanted to see a chicken strip.
How do you apologize to a koala? BEAR your heart and soul.
Why do people like working at the Red Lobster?
It helps them get out of their shell.
What did the squirrel say to its baby before it had to leave?
I'm gonna go out on a limb here.
The flock of crows that were sprayed with sewage was a true definition of murder most foul.
How do baby chickens dance?
Chick-to-chick.
What do rabbits like to sing? “Every bunny was kung fu fighting.”
Zebras aren’t fans of colouring books. They don’t like having to stay between the lions.
What’s a glow worms favourite song?
Wake me up before you glow glow!
What do you call 144 kangaroos in a box?
Gross.
Why did the hunter miss his mark?
He was not aiming deerectly for it.
Who was the criminal crow running from? The cawps.
What did the penguin say after he went shopping?
Put it on my bill.
Where does a 500-pound penguin sit?
Anywhere it wants.
Q. What is a gorilla's favorite toy?
A. A bab-boom-orang.
What did the outraged female deer say to the mule?
How deer you!
What do you get if you cross a bat with a ball?
A home run.
Why are cats bad at telling stories? Because they only have one tail!
What did the crow said when it saw a car coming? Cawr.