Which condiment is a mouse’s favourite?
Mouse-tard.
What's more amazing than a talking turkey? A spelling bee!
What do you call for injured ants?
The ant-bulance.
Why does the horse go to school?
It brings her fulfillyment.
What do you call someone who loves dogs?
A pug addict.
What do you call a large pile of cats? A meowntain!
What do you get if you cross a mouse with a Triceratops? Enormous holes in the base boards.
What’s the difference between a dog and a gator?
A dog’s bark is worse than its bite.
What do you get if you cross a pigeon and a parrot? Voicemail!
What Do You Call A Cat That Swallows A Duck?
A duck-filled-fatty-pus
What is a koala bear’s favorite mixed drink? A pina koala.
Did you know you can fit 30 bananas in a kangaroo’s pouch?
Also, I’m not allowed at the zoo anymore.
What do you call an owl with a deep voice?
A growl.
Why are parrots so good at improvisation? Because they know how to wing it!
What is the opposite of a flamingo? The answer is, a flaminstop.
Why didn’t the baby leave his momma?
Because he couldn’t bear it!
Who gives crocodiles presents on Christmas?
Santa Jaws!
What did the owl say to the judge?
I’m talon you, it wasn’t me.
Why did the bunny build herself a new house? She was fed up with the hole thing!
I went to the Chinese buffet on crab leg night and ate my fill, but they kicked me out.
They said I was being too shellfish.
How do you get down off a horse?
You don’t, you get down off a duck.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef.
What do you call an imaginary pig? A pig-ment of your imagination.
What kind of diet did the deer go on when she was trying to lose weight?
A non-deery diet.
How do you draw flies?
With a pencil!
How do you save a drowning mouse ?
Use mouse to mouse resuscitation !
What type of cat lives under the sea? A purr-maid.
What do Chinese bears eat for breakfast?
Panda-cakes!
How does an otter get into an honest business? Usually through the skylight.
What did the goat say when he woke up on a train?
I have no idea how I goat here.
What do chickens grow on?
Eggplants.
Where do apes like to cook their sausages?
On the gorilla.
What do you get if you cross a squirrel with an elephant?
An animal that remembers where it hid its nuts.
What’s an elephant’s favorite sport?
Squash.
Llama know if you don’t like these puns and alpaca my suitcase and leave!
What do you get when you cross a bat with a doorbell?
A ding-bat.
What’s black and white and stands in the corner?
A naughty panda.
What do married snakes have on their bath towels?
Hiss and Hers.
A zebra is the safest place to cross the road. Unless you are actually a zebra.
Dolphins don't have accidents.
They do everything on porpoise.
Why did the hunter miss his mark?
He was not aiming deerectly for it.
Q. Why was the blonde disappointed after her visit to an apiary?
A. There weren't any gorillas there. DUH!
My dog takes so long to get ready. He can never chews what to wear.
How did Gertie Gorilla win the beauty contest? She was the beast of the show!
What makes more noise than a dinosaur ? Two dinosaurs!
I tried to keep a koala in my house, but the smell was just unBEARable.
What do you call a fight between squirrels?
A squarrel
What’s a horse’s favorite sport?
Saddleball.
What do you call an alert ant?
Vigil-ant.
Where did the bull carry his stock-market report?
In his beef case