What’s a kangaroo’s favorite game?
Jump rope.
What is a dog’s favorite coordinates?
K9.
What did the Tyrannosaurus rex get after mopping the floor? Dino-sore!
Why are parrots so good at improvisation? Because they know how to wing it!
What’s worse than one crocodile coming to dinner?
Two crocodiles coming to dinner.
What does Pooh Bear call his girl friend?
Hunny.
Why was the baby ant confused?
Because all his uncles were ants.
What would a crow wear to the Halloween party? A crown!
Why should you never fight a Gorilla?
They know king kong fu.
What kind of ant is good at math?
An account-ant.
What two members of the cow family go everywhere with you?
Your calves.
What did the little goats say when they were caught playing a prank on the sheep?
Sorry, we were just kidding.
What cheese do you use to get a bear out of a tree?
Camembert.
Who’s the head of the penguin navy?
Admiral Byrd!
Have you guys tried kangaroo beer?
It’s a little hoppy.
What do you call an animal you keep in your car?
A Carpet
What do you call a lazy baby kangaroo?
A pouch potato.
Q. What is a gorilla's favorite holiday?
A. Ape-ril Fools Day!
What do you call an alligator that has all the other gators at the swamp crown around him?
A congregator.
How does a kangaroo pick his favorite baseball team?
He jumps on the bandwagon.
What's green, green, green, green, green?
A frog rolling down a hill.
Why do turtles never forget?
Because they have turtle recall.
Flamingos are great at social events; they flamingle really well.
What do chicken families do on Saturday afternoon?
They go on peck-nics.
What's green with red spots?
A frog with the chicken pox.
Had beaver curry last night.
Bit like a normal curry, just a little otter.
What do you get if you cross a squirrel with a kangaroo?
An animal that keeps its nuts in its pockets.
What's the opposite of a positive crocodile?
A negator
What is the definition of “moon”?
The past tense of “moo”.
Why did the bat often use mouthwash? She had bat breath.
What medicine do you give to sick ants?
Antibiotics.
What did the panda say when he was forced out of his natural habitat?
This is un-bear-able.
If you have a bee in your hand, what do you have in your eye? Beauty, because beauty is in the eye of the bee-holder.
Where does a penguin keep its money?
In a snow bank.
What is the lesser-known sport used to measure a horse’s singing ability?
Carol racing.
The story of the chicken and cow running away together sounds like a cock and bull story to me.
What do you call a dinosaur that eats fireworks? A dino-mite
Thinking about selling my crab so i could make money. Then I realised "am I really this shellfish"?
What kind of horse do you ride after dark?
A night mare.
What type of ice cream do fish like to eat?
Shark-o-late!
What is a Leatherback Sea Turtles favorite sandwich?
Peanut butter and jellyfish.
What did the cow who barged the other cow say?
Moo-ve!
What do you call fifty penguins at the North Pole?
Really lost. (Penguins live in the Southern Hemisphere)!
What do you call a flying monkey?
A hot air baboon.
Why did the frog go to the bank with a gun?
He wanted to robbit.
How many worms does it take to eat a zombie?
It depends on the size of the zombie!
What always succeeds? A toothless parrot! (sucks seeds)
Why did the magician have to cancel his show? Because he just washed his hare and couldn’t do a thing with it.
Who has better beer: Rabbits or Kangaroos?
Kanagaroos. While they both do great with the hops, Kangaroos just have a little more kick!
What animal can go into a tiger’s den and came out alive?
The tiger.