Are beavers the best builders in the animal kingdom? Dam right they are.
What happened when the kid got confused with beavers and coypus in the exam? He said, " I otter know better."
What did the mom say to her kitten when she caught him slouching? Paw attention to your paw-sture!
Why do dinosaurs eat raw meat? Because they don't know how to cook.
What do frogs do with paper?
Rip-it.
What did the Australian cowboy charge for kangaroo rides?
A Buckaroo
What does a horse call its treats?
My greatest preakness.
Where do the cool horses live?
In rad-docks.
What did the introverted pig say when asked why they don’t like socializing?
“I’m not a people porcine.”
Why was the horse such a good dancer?
It perfected its halturn.
Why did the beaver stop cutting down trees?
The work gave him gnawsea
Why did the deer go for a run?
To doe off some steam.
Which hotel do mice most often use?
The Stilton.
Why was the mouse afraid of the water?
Catfish.
My wife has been giving me a hard time about my drinking. Eventually, I agreed to quit cold turkey.
Never cared for leftovers anyway.
What do you call a mouse that doesn’t like being known about-?
Anonymouse.
What do rabbits say before they eat? Lettuce pray.
Why did the penguin cross the road?
It was the chicken’s day off.
What do you call a large pile of cats? A meowntain!
Who’s the head of the penguin navy?
Admiral Byrd!
Why did the dog go to university? To get a pe-digree.
If your piglet wants to be a wizard, there’s only one alternative: Hogwarts.
What happened to the dog who ate too much garlic?
Its bark was worse than its bite.
How do baby chickens dance?
Chick-to-chick.
What do you think of puns about deer?
“I’m very fawn’d of them myself.”
Sometimes we eat a crow while other times we eat Croatia.
Why did the gorilla cross the road? He had to take care of some monkey business.
What's the best way to stuff a turkey? Serve him lots of pizza and ice cream!
What reads and lives in an apple? A bookworm.
My dyslexia has reached a new owl.
What did the snail say as he slipped down the wall? How slime flies!
What’s a kangaroo’s favorite season?
Spring.
What do vampire bats call their friends?
Blood brothers.
My sheep-powered computer was starting to run slowly
So I added more ram
The expensive dog has gone missing.
However, police are saying that at least they have a lead. Once she is found they will Retriever.
Do you know what a beavers' favorite snack is? Wood chips.
What do you call a Spanish Goat with no hind legs?
Gracias
I went fly-fishing yesterday.
All I caught was two bluebottles.
What kind of shoes do mice wear? Squeakers.
What is a snake’s favorite dance?
The Mamba.
It's just a lot of croc 'n' roll.
Why did the deer cross the road?
To prove he wasn’t a chicken.
How do you make a goldfish old?
Take away the “G”!
If a lion is the king of the jungle...
Then shouldn’t they call it a reignforest?
How does a deer know what day of the week it is?
It looks at its calen-deer.
What is the only difference between a lion and a tiger? The mane part is missing in a tiger.
My friend asked me how my pet crow communicates…
I replied, “Microwaves”.
What did the deer say when she met her favorite celebrity?
“I’m a big fawn of your movies!”
What do you call a sheep with no legs?
A cloud.
Which side of the turkey has the most feathers? The outside
What's an owl's favorite Beatles song?
Owl You Need Is Love.