What did the pony say to the Jedi Knight before she left on her adventure?
“May the horse be with you.”
What reads and lives in an apple? A bookworm.
Why was the little bee sent to bed without supper?
Because he wouldn't beehive.
What do a crab, a lobster, and a Japanese guy run over in the middle of the road all have in common?
They're all Crushed-Asians!
What do cats eat on hot days?
Mice cream.
You must be the Easter Bunny, because you’ve got me all egg-cited.
Anything unrelated to elephants is irrelephant.
What do you get when a dinosaur sneezes? Out of the way!
What happens when two snails get into a fight? They slug it out!
What do you call someone who loves dogs?
A pug addict.
What do you call an alligator that will only eat sacrificed lambs?
A hallaligator.
What’s the difference between a fly and an eagle?
An eagle can fly but a fly cannot eagle.
Why did the bear quit his second job?
Because he needed some koalaty time with his family.
How do baby chickens dance?
Chick-to-chick.
Why did the chicken cross the basketball court?
He heard the referee calling fowls.
A beaver's experience in college deep-ends on if they go to the best university.
Besides eucalyptus leaves, what is a koala bear’s favorite vegetable? Koalaflower.
What do alligators and Windows have in common?
Neither of them has enough bytes!
What mouse was a Roman emperor?
Julius Cheeser!
What do you call it when a dinosaur gets in a car accident? Tyrannasaurus wreck!
The wolf really needed to talk with the skeleton because he had a bone to pick with him.
Where does a 2,000 pound gorilla sit?
Anywhere it wants to.
What sea creature never tells the truth
A lion fish.
The turtle had to cross the road in order to get to the Shell station.
I had a shell of a time when I attended the costume party as a turtle.
What do you call a greedy ant?
An anteater.
Why do fish swim in schools?
Because they can't walk.
What do you call a well-dressed ant?
Eleg-ant.
Why was Pegasus such a good ballerina?
He was flo-wing.
What do you call vampires bats that cheer at football games?
Bat-on-twirlers.
Why aren’t dogs good dancers?
Because they have two left feet.
If I had a talking parrot, the first thing I would teach it to say is "Help, they've turned me into a parrot!"
Who’s the penguin’s favorite Aunt?
Aunt-Arctica.
Whats green and can jump a mile a minute?
A frog with hiccups.
What do you call a parrot that won’t eat?
A Polly-no-meal.
I went to the zoo today....
only to find out that some aquatic mammals had escaped.
It was otter chaos.
Why was the horse sad she didn’t get the job?
She was flanking on it.
What should you do if you find a dinosaur in your bed ? Find somewhere else to sleep!
What do you call a turtle who takes up photography?
A snapping turtle.
What did one pig say to the other?
Let’s be pen pals.
What is a dog’s favorite movie about dinosaurs?
Jurassic Bark.
What’s a llama’s favorite drink?
Llamanade.
It is said that crows and owls are in caw-hoots.
What is a dolphin’s favorite TV show? Whale of fortune.
What did the reindeer dad tell his son?
Deer to be different!
What breed of dog will laugh at any joke?
A Chi-ha-ha
What do you call two crows flying together?
An attempted murder
What should someone do if they are stuck between a jaguar and a tiger? Simple, just take the Jaguar and drive away from the tiger.
A camel can work all week without drinking..
A man can drink all week without working.
What do chickens study in school?
Eggonomics.
Q. What do you call gorillaS who just monkey around at the gym?
A. Buff-oons