What's an owl's favorite Beatles song?
Owl You Need Is Love.
What is a dog’s favorite movie series?
Fifty shades of Greyhound.
What is the proper name for the ghost of a buffalo?
A booffalo.
What do you call a royal goat wearing denim?
Billy Jean King.
Who did the horse ask to be his second wife?
A manewer model.
What kind of music do frogs listen to?
Hip hop.
Why do penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they don’t have any pockets!
My pet crocodile needs help
Can I give him gatorade or does it only work for alligators?
If you see a wasp, don't kill it. Let it bee.
Did you hear about the piglets who wanted to do something special for Mother’s Day?
They threw a sowprize party.
What did the bear say when her date showed up too early?
I’ll be out in a minute, I’m bearly dressed.
Who was the greatest dog detective?
Sherlock Bones.
Experts suggest that the crows flying beak first into windows at a horrifying speed comit a murder suicide.
What do you get when you cross an alligator and a poison frog?
A croakadile.
What did the Australian cowboy charge for kangaroo rides?
A Buckaroo
How many mosquito's does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Only 2, no idea how they got there.
What did the gorilla wear when he was cooking in the kitchen?
An ape-ron
What did the fish say when it swam into a brick wall?
Dam!
Why was there a troop of gorillas protesting outside the biscuit factory?
They wanted to stop the production of animal crackers.
What do Penguins like to eat?
Brrrrrrrritos.
Why did the owl invite his friends over?
He didn't want to be owl by himself.
What do you get when you mix a sheep and a kangaroo
A wooly jumper
I went to the zoo the other day and saw an alligator that will only eat finely chopped food.
It was an alligrator.
What do you get when you cross an owl with an oyster?
Pearls of wisdom.
In what country is Thanksgiving ironically not celebrated? Turkey.
What do you say to a procrastinating pig? Listen, bud, it’s snout or never.
What do you call a fish with a tie?
Sofishticated!
Why did the dolphin end its own life?
It was missing a porpoise.
What do you call a bee trying to make up its mind?
A maybee
Q. Why do educated gorillas like the numbers 1, 3, 5, 7, 11 and 13?
A. 'Cause they're prime apes.
What is a criminal group of kangaroos called?
A gangaroo.
Why don’t alligators watch movies?
Because they live in swamps.
What do you call an ant from overseas?
Import-ant.
A spider called a tech support office.
He needed help connecting to the web.
What did the deer write in his journal every day? Deer diary.
What kind of work do pigs do after school?
Hamwork.
What do you call an ant who skips school?
A truant.
Why should you never ever play texas hold'em with a crocodile?
You will literally lose every hand.
What do you call a dinosaur who is elected to Congress? Rep. Tile!
How do you make an Octopus laugh?
With tentacles!
What do you call a camel without humps?
Humphrey.
What do you call two polar bears jerking each other off?
Bipolar.
What did the duck say when he bought lipstick?
"Put it on my bill."
What do you get when you cross a pig and superman?
The Man of Squeal.
Where do the monkeys melt their cheese?
Under the gorilla.
What do you get when you cross a turtle with a porcupine?
A slow poke.
How do camels blend in?
With camel-flage
Had beaver curry last night.
Bit like a normal curry, just a little otter.
What do chickens grow on?
Eggplants.
What do you say when you meet a two-headed dinosaur? Hello, hello!