Who’s a llama’s favorite U.S. president?
Barack Ollama.
Did you hear about the owl who married a goat?
The had a hootenanny.
What is a sharks favorite kinda sandwich?
Peanut butter and jellyfish!
Every koala supports the idea of being able to defend themselves against tyranny. They believe in having the right to bear claws.
Riding a camel really isn't as hard as they say it is.
Once you get over the first hump, the rest is easy.
How Do Ducks Talk?
They don't, you quack.
What does the father deer say to the mother deer to show his love?
“I love you deerly!”
A bunch of crows ganged up and killed a chicken.
It was a murder most fowl.
I started dating a girl I really like. She's really into bees.
I think she's a keeper
Why do chickens rinse their mouth out with soap?
Because of all the fowl language.
Where do dinosaurs get their mail ? At the dead-letter office!
When you come across a lost wolf, the first greeting should be, “how are you where-wolf”.
What did the Gorilla say to his friend when he called him back on the phone?
You-Rang-a-Tang?
What do you call it when you boil a water buffalo?
A mist steak.
What happened to the cat that went to the flea circus? She stole the whole show.
Why did the chicken cross the playground?
He wanted to get to the other slide.
Ravens fans are so tough....they hang out in crowbars.
How do you know a flmaingo has stolen your shoes?
Only one shoe is missing.
What do you call a bear that jumps but never lands?
Peter Panda.
Why can't you take a turkey to church? They use FOWL language.
Where do penguins go to dance?
The snow ball!
Why did the girl pour glue into her fishbowl?
She wanted to make a fish stick!
What was the most flexible dinosaur? Tyrannosaurus Flex.
Why are parrots so loyal? They are a man of their bird!
What type of dog does Dracula have?
A bloodhound.
Where was the dinosaur when the sun went down ? In the dark!
Why did the rabbit like the adventure? It was a “hare-raising tail.”
Why do fish live in salt water?
Because pepper makes them sneeze.
Where do beavers sleep? They sleep on a river bed.
Why did the frog go to the bank with a gun?
He wanted to robbit.
What does the Pope eat during Lent?
Holy mackerel.
What do you do if you find a black mamba in your toilet?
Wait until he’s finished.
My wife asked why I prefer gummy bears to gummy worms.
I said that gummy worms are beneath me.
Who’s a llama’s favorite composer?
Wolfgang Llamadeus Mozart.
Did you hear about the rabbit who refused to leave her house? She was having a bad hare day.
What does a workhorse like to drink?
A Moscow Mule.
What do you call a funny snake?
Hissssssterical.
What do you call it when a beautiful woman tries to trick you into giving her a pig?
A bae con.
Why did the bear quit his second job?
Because he needed some koalaty time with his family.
Who has better beer: Rabbits or Kangaroos?
Kanagaroos. While they both do great with the hops, Kangaroos just have a little more kick!
How did the calf’s final exam turn out?
Grade A.
Scientists transformed a tiger into a horse.
Don't worry, it's in a stable condition.
What is good at maths and related to a crocodile?
A calcu-gator
What's the opposite of an elephant?
An eleph-antonym.
What is a koala’s favorite type of fruit? Bearies.
What is a dog’s favorite pick-up line?
You must be my backyard… because I dig you
What is a giraffe’s favorite fruit?
Necktarines.
Why did the bunny bang his head on the piano? He was playing by ear!
What happens when a hen eats gunpowder?
She lays hand gren-eggs.
My wife and I are very competitive, but when it came to flamingo impersonation, I didn't stand a chance
She had a leg up the whole time.