Local restaurant has kangaroo loin and it’s actually pretty good
It’s been awhile since I had it, but I remember it being a little jumpy and has a kick.
2 flies are playing soccer on a plate.
One says to the other "you'd better pick up your game Louie, we're playing in the cup tomorrow".
How do whales make a decision?
They flipper coin.
I finally found out why flamingos sleep with one leg up! If they had both legs up they would fall over.
How many limbs does an alligator have?
It all depends on what he ate for lunch, dinner and breakfast.
Where did the kittens go on a school field trip? To the mewseum
What is the lesser-known sport used to measure a horse’s singing ability?
Carol racing.
The reason the cow wore a bell around her neck was because her horn didn’t work anymore.
How did the horse solve a murder?
Compiled newspaper clippings.
What do you called a crow that cant find his way?
A lost caws
What do you call a bat who gets a charge out of life?
A battery.
What do you call a koala with a negative attitude? The bearer of bad news.
Why was the deer a good driver? He was great at using the deering wheel!
What problem did the young bat experience?
The hangout.
What do chickens call school tests?
Eggs-aminations.
Q. What do they call the gorilla marathon runner who only wins when it's pouring outdoors?
A. The raining chimp-ion.
What cheese do you use to get a bear out of a tree?
Camembert.
Where did the hamsters invade the beaver colony? Hamsterdam.
What did the bear say when he got a joke? He just bear-ly had a chuckle!
Why do crabs never give to charity?
Because they’re shellfish.
What does a chocolate crow say? “Cacao!”
Why was the little bear so spoiled?
Because its mother panda’d to its every whim!
What do dehydrated alligators drink?
Gatorade.
What did hear about the two bats meeting?
It was love at first bite!
What is the best thing to do if you notice a gorilla is sitting at your desk?
Find another place to sit.
How do you make a duck sing soul music?
Put him in the microwave until his Bill Withers
What do mountain climbers share around the campfire?
Goat Stories!
How do horses show gratitude?
Flank you very much.
What do you call a bat with ebola? African batman.
Why is it easy for chicks to talk?
Because talk is cheep.
What do you get if you cross a bat with a woodpecker?
Bat-a-tat.
What do you call a happy penguin?
A penGRIN.
Why did the dinosaur paint her toenails red? So she could hide in the strawberry patch!
What do you call a gorilla with a machine gun ?
Whatever it wants to be called.
What do you call a dinosaur with one eye?
A do-you-think-he-saur-us.
You can always find the little cows eating lunch inside the calf-etiria.
What was the turkey suspected of? Fowl play.
It may seem a bit corny but we appreciate you working your tail off for us.
The feeling you get when you think you have heard these cow puns before is known as deja-mooo.
What’s a horse’s favorite grocery store?
No-fillies.
What do you call a kangaroo that’s exhausted from trespassing?
Out of bounds.
Did you hear about the constipated crocodile?
It was a crockashit.
What soccer position does a pink flamingo play? Flamingoalie.
What did the husband beaver say to the wife beaver to express his love and gratitude? You are the one for me, waddle I do without you?
What did the pig do when it came to a pork in the road? It pigged the road less traveled.
What do you get when a dinosaur walks through the strawberry patch? Strawberry jam.
What do you get when you mix a sheep and a kangaroo
A wooly jumper
What did the goat farmer’s wife say to her husband when he was swearing on the job?
“Not in front of the kids!”
What did the shark say to the whale?
What are you blubbering about?
What do you get if you cross a mouse with a Triceratops? Enormous holes in the base boards.