What is a koala’s favorite Christmas carol? Deck the halls with boughs of holly, koala-la-la-la, la-la-la-la!!!
Why did the horse go to jail?
The prosecutors failed to show the burden of hoof.
What did the deer say after prancing around a cloning machine for an hour?
“I feel like a million bucks!”
My dog wants to be a tradesman.
I think he wants to be a woof-er.
Baby seal walks into a club...
Years later he would sing A kiss from a rose in the same club.
What’s a goat’s favorite drink?
Goat-arade.
How do Penguins drink their cola?
On the rocks.
One of the punny pig names for a pig that loves Shakespeare is Hamlet.
What style of classical music do sheep most enjoy?
Baa-roque
Where did Noah keep his bees? In his archive.
Where do penguins go to dance?
The snow ball!
What kind tree grows chickens?
Poultry.
A teacher asks the class to name six mammals that you might find in Africa. One of the pupils replies, “five zebras and a lion”.
What kind of magic does a love-struck giraffe practice?
Neck-romance-y.
Why is earth worm humor offensive?
They only know dirty jokes.
Why did they let the turkey join the band? Because he had the drumsticks
What do you call a goat swimming in the sea?
Billy Ocean.
If you had fifteen cows and five goats what would you have?
Plenty of milk.
What do we call a deer that wears a mask and refuses to tell its name?
“Anony – moose.”
What does an owl need after having a bath?
A t-owl.
You cross a turtle with a giraffe and a kangaroo and you end up with a turtle
neck jumper.
What do you call a dinosaur with high heels? My-feet-are-saurus
Wolves love shopping and they can literally die for. However, none of them loves the flea market for obvious reasons!
When the farmer died, all his chickens were sold to the highest bidder.
They would have preferred to stay on the farm, but auctions speak louder than birds.
When a lion takes a lioness from another lion, he kills and eats any cubs she has. You'd think he'd be ashamed of himself.
But apparently he just swallows his pride.
What do you call a pig that drives around recklessly?
A road hog.
What kind of ice cream do pigs like best?
Hoggin Daz!
What do you call a flamingo that flew into a wall?
A flamingstop.
What happened if vampires came to a big dance?
A bat ball.
What made the dinosaur's car stop ? A flat Tire-annosaurus
What do you call an elephant that never washes?
A smelly-phant.
What do you get when dinosaurs crash their cars ? Tyrannosaurus wrecks.
A star athlete in Koalaville got kicked off the Olympic team for cheating. Unfortunately, he was diskoalafied.
What is a parrot’s favorite game?
Hide and Speak!
What do a dog and a cell phone have in common?
They both have collar ID.
Every koala supports the idea of being able to defend themselves against tyranny. They believe in having the right to bear claws.
What does a horse call her best friend?
Her mane chick.
How do you communicate with a fish?
Drop him a line.
What kind of deer make great weather forecasters?
Rain-deer.
Once you've seen one Lion eat a Giraffe...
You've seen a maul!
What do you get when you cross a lion with a parrot?
I don't know, but when it talks, you better listen.
What was the shark’s favorite Tim Burton film?
Edward Scissorfins.
Whats green and can jump a mile a minute?
A frog with hiccups.
What do you call a poor ant?
A peas-ant.
How does a Spanish dog say Merry Christmas?
Feliz navi-dog.
Whale, whale, whale …
If it isn’t a pod.
What do you get if you cross a parrot with a woodpecker?
A bird that talks in morse code!
Experts suggest that the crows flying beak first into windows at a horrifying speed comit a murder suicide.
What does a deer say when it prays to the god?
“Deer God!”
The beaver offered some freshly streamed buns to his guests.