Who did the goats vote for as president?
Billy Clinton.
Which color is a zebra's base color? The debate is endless, and there is no clear answer.
It both is and isn't a black-and-white issue.
How did the horse break into the mainframe?
It was a hack.
How do crabs evade taxes?
They set up shell corporations.
What is it called when a dinosaur hits a homerun?
A Dino-Score.
What are pigs celebrating when they celebrate their birthday? The day they were boar-n.
How do camels blend in?
With camel-flage
What did the tiger say to her cub on his birthday?
It’s roar birthday!
I'm going to start a business selling worms and Nintendo consoles
I'll call it "Bait and Switch."
Why do bees stay in the hive during the winter?
Swarm.
Heard about the devoted beaver who crossed the turbulent river? He took a leap of faith!
What do you get if you cross a frog with a ferry?
A hoppercraft.
Why was the skeleton afraid of the dog?
Because dogs love bones.
What did the pony say to the Jedi Knight before she left on her adventure?
“May the horse be with you.”
Why are houseflies great at arithmetics? Because they multiply really fast.
What’s a racehorse’s favorite clothing brand? Jockey.
Did you hear about the egg laden rabbit who jumps off bridges? He’s the Easter Bungee!
What does an evil penguin lay?
Deviled eggs.
Who is a polar bear’s favorite musician?
Seal.
What did the cat say when he ate the clownfish? This tastes a little funny!
My girlfriend and I saw an inflatable gorilla In front of a jacuzzi store
She asked me why they would do that for a jacuzzi store. I told her it was a guerilla tactic. She was not impressed.
Did you hear about the piglets who wanted to do something special for Mother’s Day?
They threw a sowprize party.
Why are beavers so good in maths? They love log'arithms.
What did the deer say to each other when they were trying to solve a difficult problem? This is such a deer-lemma!
What is a mosquitos worst fear?
The S.W.A.T Team.
What were the ponies most excited for in the meal?
The main horse.
What is worse than raining cats and dogs?
Hailing taxis.
What do you call an owl dressed in armor?
A knight owl.
My dog hates the rain.
He doesn’t want to step in a poodle.
Why did the ram run over the cliff edge?
Because he didn’t see the ewe turn.
What does a Saudi bee call its bros?
Habibees.
What kind of tree does a chicken come from?
A poul-tree.
Zebras usually hold strong opinions. They are very black and white creatures.
What did the woodworm say to the chair?
It's been nice gnawing you.
What do mountain climbers share around the campfire?
Goat Stories!
I went drinking with a bunch of kangaroos last night and they didn't buy me one drink all evening..
Talk about short arms long pockets...
Why don't crabs donate to charity?
They're shellfish penny pinchers.
What do you feed a 700 pound gorilla?
Just give him anything he wants and then run.
3 animals enter a bar. A lion, a tiger and a bear.
Oh my!
What medication does a snake with hay fever take?
An antihissstamine.
The mossbacks could not connect with the new developments, so the bill was hot
down at the senate.
Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?
Because it takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
What’s a mouse favourite family sitcom?
Full Mouse.
What should you give a deer when it gets stomachache?
Elk-a-seltzer.
What is gray, hairy and lives on a mans face? A mouse-tache!
Llama know if you don’t like these puns and alpaca my suitcase and leave!
How do baby chickens dance?
Chick-to-chick.
Why can't you take a turkey to church? They use FOWL language.
Where do owls go on their honeymoon?
Their love nest.
Q. What did the mother doe name her new twin babies?
A. Bam B and Bam A.