Why are crows so interesting?
Just beCAWse
What is an owl’s dream occupation?
Flight attendant.
Why didn't the T-rex skeleton attack the museum visitors? Because she had no guts!
Q. What do you get when you cross a doe with a bull?
A. A deery cow.
Why did the bald man paint rabbits on his head? Because from a distance they looked like hares!
After graduating from high school, crows go to caw-lleges for further studies.
What does a Triceratops sit on? Its Tricera-bottom.
How do baby chickens dance?
Chick-to-chick.
My pet raven, Poe, started coughing... thought it was Corvid-19, but then the bird flu away. Think I will see him nevermore.
What do you call a fish that floats on the surface?
Bob.
What does an alligator do when he loses his tail?
It goes to a re-tail store.
Why don't squirrels wear skinny jeans?
Because their nuts won't fit.
When doesn’t a bull have horns?
When it’s a bullfrog.
Q. How do you make a sasquatch, a yeti, or a bigfoot laugh?
A. Tell it a gorilla joke!
Why should you never ever play texas hold'em with a crocodile?
You will literally lose every hand.
What do you call a lazy baby kangaroo?
A pouch potato.
What is the best period of a bee's relationship?
The honeymoon.
The manager for that dairy farm was referred to as the cow-ordinator.
What did the puppy say to his mum?
I woof you.
Any advice on getting a pet pig? Just be sure you get the pig of the litter.
What did the pig say on the warm summer’s day?
“I’m bacon.”
Rabbits are trying to eat away my old Toyota!
Mechanic said it could be car rot.
A sheep, a drum, and a snake fall off a cliff.
Baa dum tssssss.
What is good at maths and related to a crocodile?
A calcu-gator
What did the pony say to the Jedi Knight before she left on her adventure?
“May the horse be with you.”
What do you call an ant who skips school?
A truant.
Why was the crow upset about his job? The HR fired the crow with no caws.
How do you wash a horse?
On a sponge-line.
Where do pigs keep their money? Why in the piggy bank, of course.
What do you call a bat with ebola? African batman.
What do you call monkeys who share an Amazon account?
Prime mates.
What do you get when you cross a fawn with a bumblebee?
Bambee.
What did the disappointed deer say? Oh deer!
What should someone do if they are stuck between a jaguar and a tiger? Simple, just take the Jaguar and drive away from the tiger.
What game do little bats like to play?
Batty fight.
Who did the horse ask to be his second wife?
A manewer model.
Why do beavers make the best neighbors?
Because they mind their own dam business.
Why are koala's so sleepy? Because you just got to be tired being so darn cute all day!
A gorilla starts off his day by going to his car
When he gets to his car, he notices hes missing something. He walks back in his house, and asks his wife "Have you seen monkeys?"
Why is earth worm humor offensive?
They only know dirty jokes.
A woman tried to order an exotic snake online, but was surprised to find that when the package arrived, it contained only feathered scarves.
In what country is Thanksgiving ironically not celebrated? Turkey.
Q: What’s a tiger’s favorite color?
A: Roar-range.
Don’t wait on me to start the meeting. I might be a hare late.
Top 25 Funniest Duck Names:
1. James Pond
2. Quack Sparrow
3. Duck Norris
4 Quacks-a-Lot
5 Quackhead
6 Quacko
7. Quackers
8. Nutquacker
9. Quacker Jack
10. Quack Efron
11. Quack Black
12. Moby Duck
13. Quackula
14. Sir Duckington
15. Eggbert
16. Quackers
17. Duckleberry Finn
18. Quacker Jack
19. Lucky Duck
20. Cheese and quackers
21. Quaker Jack
22. Duckingham Palace
23.Waddles
24. Quackie Chan
25 Firequacker
Would you rather kiss a shark or a jellyfish?
A jellyfish. That’s a no-brainer.
What do you call a cat that gets what they want? Purr-suasive.
Have you heard about that socially awkward chef that only cooks with snake meat?
I’m pretty sure he has Asp burgers.
What do you call a Pig with three eyes?
Piiig.
The lobster is one shell of an animal.