What happened when the kitten turned one? She had a birthday paw-ty.
What do you call a thirsty camel ?
A dry humper.
What's the best way to talk to a Tyrannosaur ? Long distance!
What happens when a hen eats gunpowder?
She lays hand gren-eggs.
Who wears red and brings catnip to sleeping kittens? Santa Claws!
Why Was The Teacher Annoyed With The Duck?
Because he wouldn't quit quackin' jokes!
Why was there a troop of gorillas protesting outside the biscuit factory?
They wanted to stop the production of animal crackers.
How long do chickens work?
Around the cluck.
What is just as big as a gorilla but literally weighs nothing?
A gorilla's shadow.
What did the turkey say to the man who tried to shoot it? Liberty, Equality and Bad aim for all.
What do you get if you cross a pigeon and a parrot? Voicemail!
I asked my dog why he was having a bad day.
But all he said was “ruff”.
Why did the chicken go to KFC?
He wanted to see a chicken strip.
What do you call a dog that’s been left outside in the cold?
A chili dog.
Have you ever tried crossing a lion with a flamingo? It will be pink, that’s the mane thing.
What do you call a turkey's evil twin?
A Gobblegänger.
It is said that crows and owls are in caw-hoots.
What do you call a Blind Dinosaur's Dog? Do-ya-think-he-saurus-rex.
When doing laundry, the mother wolf accidentally fell into the washing machine. It became a wash and wearwolf.
Where do fish save their money?
In the river bank.
How did the horse solve a murder?
Compiled newspaper clippings.
What did the introverted pig say when asked why they don’t like socializing? “I’m not a people porcine.”
How does an otter get into an honest business? Usually through the skylight.
What's a Koalas favorite drink? Coca Koala!
What did the tiger say to her cub on his birthday?
It’s roar birthday!
Why did the cat decide to sleep under the car? Because she wanted to wake up oily!
What’s a deer’s favorite place to get ice cream?
Deery Queen.
Where do beavers keep their money? Well, they keep it in the riverbank.
Where does a baby monkey sleep?
In an apricot.
How do baby horses get tucked in at night?
They get told a tail.
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fishually impaired.
What does a goat call his girlfriend?
Bae.
Why do chickens rinse their mouth out with soap?
Because of all the fowl language.
How do fish get high?
Seaweed.
What would you rather be, a polar bear or a little otter. A little (h)otter
How did the horse make payments?
In in-stallion-ments.
I went to the Veterinarian today.
She really knew how to make my dog heal.
How can you tell where the Easter Bunny has been? Eggs mark the spot.
How do you stop a bear from charging?
Take away its credit cards.
My son wanted a pet spider but they're to expensive.
I told him I'll get him one off the web.
What do you call a Koala that can pick up an elephant ? Sir!
What is the maggot army called? The Apple Corps.
The builder beaver decided to launch a new liquid dam-building product, but the market was too saturated.
What did the dog say to its fleas?
Stop bugging me
What does a horse call her best friend?
Her mane chick.
What do you say to a bee that bothers you?
"Buzz off!"
What is the first thing that gorillas learn at kindergarten?
Apey Cee's?
Why did the fish blush?
Because it saw the ocean's bottom.
What do cows do for entertainment?
They rent moovies!
Where is the best place to get camel milk?
Straight from the Dromedairy.