What type of bread do deers enjoy the most?
“Sour-doe!”
What was the dog’s favorite book?
Winnie the Pooch. He loves to read a lot of story tails before bed.
Have you ever heard of Pavlov’s dog?
Yeah, he rings a bell
A bear covered in a bunch of crows gives the picture of a grizzly murder.
What do you call a polyarmourus deceased gorilla?
Harembe.
My dog loves poetry.
Especially William Shakes-paw.
How did the horse get up the stairs?
He mounted them.
Picking your favorite snack can be like picking the slowest turtle in the pack.
Where do horses buy groceries?
Whinny-Dixie.
Q. Which Greek eggplant dish do deer really eat up?
A. Moose-aka.
What happened to the pig who ate too fast? They got a ticket for running a Slop Sign.
Did you hear about the crow who worked at a call Center?
He was fired for Just Caws.
Which condiment is a mouse’s favourite?
Mouse-tard.
What do you get when you cross a bat with the internet? blood-thirsty hacker baby
What do you call a cold penguin?
A Brrr-d.
Why do piglets take home economics in school? To learn how to sow.
What's it called when a buffalo turns two hundred years old?
A Bisontennial!
What do you get when you cross a chicken with a Martian?
An eggs-traterrestrial.
Why don’t pigs eat cake? Because they’re morally opposed to bacon.
How does the Easter Bunny stay healthy? Eggsercise, particularly hareobics!
A dung beetle walks into a bar and asks: “Is this stool taken?”
Why was the teenager deer a bad driver?
He didn’t want to use the deering wheel.
How do you catch a rich squirrel?
Climb a tree and act like a cashew.
What do you call an alligator who is wearing crocs on his feet?
A traitor.
What do you call a handsome seal?
Mr. Seal Yo Girl.
What's black and white and eats like a horse?
A zebra.
What do you call a white crow?
A caw-casian.
How does a penguin get around?
By icicle.
What always succeeds? A toothless parrot! (sucks seeds)
Why did the dog walk in to the saloon?
He was looking for the man who shot his paw
What do you call a dinosaurs fart? "A blast from the past"
Why do owls always by mystery novels?
They love hoo-dunits.
What do you call a happy penguin?
a Pen-Grin!
What is a cat’s favorite magazine? Good Mousekeeping.
What did the Clydesdale use to deal cards at the casino?
A horse-shoe.
What did the little piglet want from the swine?
A piggyback ride home.
What has four legs, four eyes, and a net? Four pirates looking for a lost parrot!
Where does a cat keep its coins? In its purr-se.
What do you call Tyrannosaurus rex when it wears a cowboy hat and boots ? Tyrannosaurus tex!
How can a bear catch fish without a pole?
They use their bear hands.
What do you call a pig with no legs?
A groundhog.
What separates humans from dolphins?
The surface of the water.
Got a pet zebra, didn’t realise how hungry they are. He eats like a horse.
What does a chicken need to lay an egg every day?
Hen-durance.
What was the snail doing on the highway? About one mile a day!
What is a dog’s favorite vegetable? A collie flower.
What's a Koalas favorite drink? Coca Koala!
Who is a Penguin’s favorite pop star?
Seal.
How many mosquito's does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Only 2, no idea how they got there.
Which city do hamsters live in?
Hamsterdam.