What is a cat’s favorite game to play with a mouse? Catch!
What do you call a woman with a frog on her head?
Lily.
What does a horse call her best friend?
Her mane chick.
My son wanted a pet spider but they're to expensive.
I told him I'll get him one off the web.
Q: How does a tiger move a boat?
A: He uses roars.
What is a nerdy alligator’s favorite programming language?
Jaw-va.
What's the difference between a strawberry and a Tyrannosaurus? The strawberry is red!
Why did the shark cross the great barrier reef?
To get to the other tide.
Whichever gator stole all the food, we'll catch the crook-a-dile.
What’s worse than raining cats and dogs?
Hailing taxi cabs.
Why doesn’t an owl study for a test?
They prefer to wing it.
What does a horse call its treats?
My greatest preakness.
Where do the cool horses live?
In rad-docks.
What do you call a three-eyed tiger?
A tiiiger.
What does a beaver from Philly drink?
Wooder.
What kind of camel throws a hissy fit when you milk it?
A drama dairy.
What do you call a Mexican snake?
Hisssspanic.
How do you make a fish laugh?
Tell it a whale of a tale.
What do you get when you cross a dog with a calculator?
A friend you can count on.
What’s a snow princess’s glow worm’s favourite song?
Let it Glow, Let it Glow!
What do you get when you cross a cow with a wolf?
An animal that mooed at the full moon.
Why don’t pigs eat cake? Because they’re morally opposed to bacon.
I finally found out why flamingos sleep with one leg up! If they had both legs up they would fall over.
Why did the cat keep meow-ing? It didn’t want to be fur-gotten.
What fish are at the zoo?
Lion fish!
Why are mice afraid of the water?
Because of catfish.
Why do beavers make the best neighbors?
Because they mind their own dam business.
Why do fish like worms?
Fish like worms because they’re hooked on them.
What do you get when you cross a tiger and a snowman? Frost-bite!
In the 5th month of every year, my aunt lets her pigs in the field…
It’s mayham!
What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with an alien?
A Mars-upial.
What do you get if you cross a wasp with a doorbell?
A hum-dinger!
Why do Dachshunds nap in the sun?
Because they’re hot dogs.
Due to social distancing, I had a conversation with a spider today,
Seems nice, he’s a web designer.
Who puts money under a deer’s pillow when they lose a tooth?
The hoof fairy.
Which fish go to heaven when they die?
Angelfish.
A week after the werewolf swallowed the farmer’s clock, it had ticks all over.
Did you hear about the croc calling the frog? He just croc-o-dialled.
Why are cats scared of trees?
Because of their bark.
What do Chinese bears wear over their faces when they’re robbing banks?
Pandanas!
What do you call a bear with a bad attitude?
The bearer of bad news.
Did you know that the blue whale is so big, that if you laid it end to end on a basketball court …
The game would be cancelled.
What do you call a handsome seal?
Mr. Seal Yo Girl.
I stole seven crows yesterday.
Got away with murder.
A beaver's tail makes them look odd.
But without it they would look otter.
What do you get when you cross a kangaroo with an angry man? A kangryoo
What do you call a rabbit who is angry over getting burnt? A hot cross bunny.
Why are elephants scared of computers?
Because of the mouse.
What do you call a large pile of cats? A meowntain!
What does a horse do when it smells rotten seafood?
It scallops outta there.
Q. What did the Aussie zookeeper say to the gorilla who was spying on him?
A. There's no need to pry, mate.