What did they call prehistoric sailing disasters? Tyrannosaurus wrecks.
Which dinosaurs were the best policemen? Tricera-cops.
Does Mr. Otterton listen to Gazelle? Yes he's a rabid fan.
Why do dogs hate computers?
They can’t stick their heads out of those Windows.
The feeling you get when you think you have heard these cow puns before is known as deja-mooo.
What was the worm doing in the cornfield?
He was going in one ear and out the other!
Why shouldn’t you shoot an alligator?
He’ll just bite the bullet and make the best of it.
What do sea monsters eat?
Fish and ships.
How do you get a one-armed monkey out of a tree?
Wave to it.
What do snakes use to clean their car windows?
Windscreen vipers.
Who is a polar bear’s favorite musician?
Seal.
Where do prehistoric reptiles like to go on vacation? To the dino-shore.
What did the pitcher tell the bat? Batter-up.
What do beavers like to put on their salads?
Branch dressing.
What does a penguin where to the beach?
An ice cap.
What noise does a gorilla’s doorbell make?
King Kong
Q. Why did the girl-illa win the beauty contest?
A. She was beast of show!
What praise did a bat’s friend deserve? A bat on the back.
Why did the turkey NOT cross the road?
To prove that he wasn't chicken.
The builder beaver decided to launch a new liquid dam-building product, but the market was too saturated.
Where do crabs invest their money?
A sea bank.
What’s a buck’s least favorite sandwich bread?
Sour doe.
What did one beaver say to the other at the river? Dam it.
Why did the shark cross the great barrier reef?
To get to the other tide.
What do you can a kangaroo covered in tape?
Hopscotch
What do you get if you cross a bat with a woodpecker?
Bat-a-tat.
What does Harry Potter use when sealing packages?
His Parceltongue.
Why did the tiger lose at poker?
Because he was playing with a cheetah.
What’s a pig’s favorite color? Ma-hog-any.
What do ducks get after they eat?
A bill.
What’s the silliest name you can give a tiger?
Spot.
Her: "Buffalo meat is delicious. What are they made of? Beef?"
Me: "No... They're made of buff."
What is a Leatherback Sea Turtles favorite sandwich?
Peanut butter and jellyfish.
Do you know how long dinosaurs should be fed? Exactly the same as short dinosaurs!
I used to own a rabbit, but now he’s just some bunny that I used to know.
Zebras aren’t fans of colouring books. They don’t like having to stay between the lions.
Q. Whay aren't gorillas afraid of zombies?
A. Because the ape-ocalypse doesn't frighten them.
I painted a picture of my cat’s feet today.
You could say it was a paw-trait.
Where did Velociraptor buy things? At a dino-store!
How did the shark do on his test?
Fin-Tastic!
I stole seven crows yesterday.
Got away with murder.
What’s a shark favorite substance?
Reefer.
A teacher asks the class to name six mammals that you might find in Africa. One of the pupils replies, “five zebras and a lion”.
Why do dogs run in circles?
Because it’s hard to run in a square.
The sweetest and punny name to call a pig is Mudpie.
Why was the dog chasing his own tail?
Because he was trying to make both ends meet.
Why wasn’t the giraffe invited to the party?
He was a pain in the neck.
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur A lickalotopis
Why do fish swim in schools?
Because they can't walk.
What do you call a bird that can fix anything?
Duck Tape.