My glasses fogged up once I came out of the AC room last summer, but I was okay because I was opti-mistic.
When is it raining money? Whenever there's 'change' in the weather.
What goes hiss, swish, hiss swish every time it rains? A windscreen viper.
What is an evil dictator’s favorite type of weather?
A rain of terror.
Many people seem to believe that warm water droplets get cooled fast and form fog. It's a mist-conception. Someone should de-mist-ify it.
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Butter
Butter who?
Butter get an umbrella, it looks like it's going to rain!
Q: Why did the tornado take a break?
A: Because it ran out of wind!
Q: Why do windmills love loud, heavy rock music?
A: They’re metal fans.
I’ve never understood fog machines.
They mystify me to this day.
What's the wind's favourite colour?
Blew
When the storm begun, the garden party became a bit disorganized and food service was turned to a frost come frost served.
Because it was so foggy at my father’s funeral, he was buried in the wrong plot.
It was a grave mist-stake.
I'm going to discuss global warming on Sunday at a debate. It's a very heated topic.
It was pretty foggy outside today.
I shot an arrow in the air, and it stuck.
What do you call a weather man that destroys dinosaurs?
A meteorologist
What did one cloud of fog say to the other?
I don’t know. It’s a mistery.
What did the ghost knights say to the cloud king?
Our souls will rain forever.
The best place meteorologists can stop to get a drink on their way home is the isobar.
What did the vegan wear to the beach?
A zucchini!
What’s worse than raining cats and dogs?
Hailing taxis.
A man went to buy long underwear cause the weather was getting cold. The cashier asked " How long would you like them"
"From march to September", said the man.
Did you hear about those really bad storms that hit that boy scout camp over night?
They were in tents.
I thought I saw some fog yesterday.
But I guess my memory’s a little cloudy.
How could the skeleton tell that rain was coming?
He could feel it in his bones.
What is fog's favorite drink? Mountain Dew
I wanted to be a professional fortune-teller but I wasn't very good at it. I could only predict when there would be bad winter storms. Well, turns out I had been using a snow globe.
Nowadays, people drought the accuracy of weather men because the climatic patterns are so unpredictable.
I'm feeling exceptionally alone in this cold weather. It's probably because I'm completely ice-olated.
You can't blame anyone if you fall in your driveway due to snowy weather...
Because that's your own asphalt.
What do you call an English rock band playing in the mist? Foghat.
Why don’t Native Americans like to do rain dances in April anymore?
Because April showers bring Mayflowers.
Everyone said the wind was powerful. So, I went outside and was blown away.
What always goes up whenever the rain comes down? An umbrella.
Q: What do you call a row of 10 blondes standing ear to ear?
A: A wind tunnel.
I hate windy weather. It really blows.
What do you get if you come fourth in the National Weatherman Awards? A precipitation trophy.
What do you call a bear that’s stuck out in the rain?
A drizzly bear.
Q: What's a tornado's favorite game?
A: Twister
Even during thunderstorms, Santa can still deliver presents because raindeers fly his sleigh.
With the kind of weather, it was almost certain that the bride-to-be would get a hoarse throat as she walked through the rain into her bridal shower.
Q: What do you call a freezing bird?
A: Brrrrrrrrrdddd
With the nice warm weather last weekend, a neighbor was enthusiastically diggin' in the dirt planting his garden!
He was so excited about it, he wet his plants.
Q: How does a butcher keep his tent up in a strong winds?
A: With steaks!
How does one raindrop ask another out? Water you doing tonight?
What do you call a storm that doesn't come to fruition?
A mist opportunity!
When we were young, we had this myth that lightning bolts go all the way to cloud 9.
My glasses may be fogged up, but don’t worry I’ll be fine.
I’m optimistic!
When can your cup of coffee tell the weather?
When it's muggy.
What does Santa often say to Mrs Claus? Come and look at the rain-dear.
Mother always knows best. But when winter comes around, Mother Nature snows best.
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