Is there a bathroom in this tennis club? Because I’m about to drop a deuce.
Tennis is a lot like waiting tables. The most important thing to get right is the first serve.
Is your nickname cream cheese? Because you’re about to get bageled.
Is your eyesight as bad as your cell phone reception? Because that was a terrible call.
Fred is so condescending about my tennis strokes. I can’t take any more of his backhanded compliments.
What time should I book the court? Let’s shoot for around tennish.
Why can’t I ever win a game returning serve? Give me a break.
Most of your players never make it out of the lower-level tournaments. I highly doubt their Futures as a professional.
The classiest indoor tennis facilities serve bubble tea.
A man named Martin Draw was campaigning for the Senate. He printed up shirts saying “I’m with Draw” to support his campaign. The next day, he wore the shirt to a tennis tournament. When he walked up to the tournament desk, the director handed him his money back and asked him why he couldn’t play.
I’d like to throw away my old can, but my pusher friend here says he loves junk balls.
I know my shot was in. But I won’t argue, because I’m not up for the challenge.
I prefer the new system to reviewing line calls. When Hawk-eye came around, I breathed a big Cy-clops of relief.
Djokovic to his friends the morning after winning the U.S. Open: Is anyone hungry for some Denny’s? Because I would like another Grand Slam.
They call me Ace, because you just got served.
Is it ad-out again? I’m going to hit my breaking point.
Jack has a large neck so he decided to wear a bowtie to his wedding. Otherwise, he’d end up with a tiebreak.
A hippie when his opponent disputes his calls: That’s pretty far-out, man!
The walls in this tennis factory are so thin, that when I try to get some work done, all I hear is people making a racquet.
An orange and an apple signed up for a tournament. No one was surprised to find out they were both seeded.
I like my breakfast like my tennis grip: Continental.
I tried to hit the picture cleanly over the fence, but it was framed.
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