What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on your doorstep? Matt. What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the ocean?
Bob.
Why does it take pirates so long to learn the alphabet?
Because they spend years at C!
My dad hates the ocean, but the other day he bought a boat.
He never could resist a good sail.
What is a blue whale’s favourite James Bond Film?
Licence to Krill.
Where does a killer whale go for braces?
The orca-dontist.
What is the best way to communicate with a fish?
Drop it a line!
I was trying to look at a picture of the ocean but kept having to reload the page, it finally worked after 5 attempts.
That was refreshing to sea.
Why is the ocean so salty?
Because the land never waves back.
Why does the ocean roar?
You would too if you had crabs on your bottom.
Why is the ocean always blue?
Because the shore never waves back.
I was going to tell a joke about the natural disaster in the Indian Ocean
But it was too Tsunami.
Where does seaweed look for a job?
In the kelp-wanted section.
How do you cut an ocean in half?
With a seasaw!
Where do shellfish go to borrow money?
The prawn broker.
Why did the lobster blush?
Because the sea weed.
What does a mermaid wear to math class?
An algae-bra, naturally.
Why are seabirds so lucky in love?
Because one good tern always deserves another.
Did you hear about the sea captain who made a special salt-proof boat for the salty waters of the ocean?
It was a sailing solution to cross a saline solution
What did the wise papa fish tell his son?
Keep your friends close and your anemones closer.
I wanted make a joke about the ocean, but it's too deep
Why does the mermaid wear seashells?
Because she grew out of her B-shells.
What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
A nervous wreck.
What did the lobsterman say when his crate turned up empty?
It a-piers we have a problem.
Why Did the Whale Cross the Ocean?
To get to the other tide.
What do you call two bandits in a race on the ocean.
Piracy.
My friend asked me how big the ocean is.
I said "can you be more Pacific?"
What do you call a big fish that makes you an offer you can’t refuse?
The Codfather.
Do you know what would happen when you throw a Finnish sailor into the ocean?
Helsinki.
Did you hear about the red ship that collided with the blue ship?
All the sailors were marooned.
What did the carp say to his crush?
Don’t play koi with me!
Why did the fisherman suddenly redirect his boat?
Just for the halibut.
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