Why did the fisherman suddenly redirect his boat?
Just for the halibut.
What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on your doorstep? Matt. What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the ocean?
Bob.
Do you know what would happen when you throw a Finnish sailor into the ocean?
Helsinki.
Did you hear about the lawyer who tried to sue a shark for biting all his limbs off?
He didn’t have a leg to stand on.
Where does a killer whale go for braces?
The orca-dontist.
How do you split the ocean in half?
With a sea-saw.
What do you call two bandits in a race on the ocean.
Piracy.
What does a fish say when he makes a mistake?
It was just a fluke!
What drug is illegal in the ocean
Sea weed
What did the wise papa fish tell his son?
Keep your friends close and your anemones closer.
How did the shark plead in the murder case?
Not gill-ty.
What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
A nervous wreck.
My friend asked me how big the ocean is.
I said "can you be more Pacific?"
I went fishing in the ocean the other day and caught one fish
but I think it was just a fluke.
How are bad school grades like a shipwreck in the Arctic Ocean? They're both below C level!
What’s a cetacean’s favorite TV show?
Whale of Fortune.
What do you call a big fish that makes you an offer you can’t refuse?
The Codfather.
What does a mermaid wear to math class?
An algae-bra, naturally.
I was trying to look at a picture of the ocean but kept having to reload the page, it finally worked after 5 attempts.
That was refreshing to sea.
Why does the mermaid wear seashells?
Because she grew out of her B-shells.
What did the Ocean say to the shore?
Nothing. It just waved.
What does a dolphin say when he’s confused?
Can you please be more Pacific?
What does the fish say when she disagrees with her husband?
I don’t quite sea it that way.
What did the carp say to his crush?
Don’t play koi with me!
A red ship and a blue ship collided in the ocean.
Apparently the survivors are marooned.
What did one tidepool say to the other tidepool?
Show me your mussels!
Australia announced that they have begun dumping sewage into the ocean
It’s now classified as an in-continent.
What do baleen whales call a hook-up?
Netflix and krill.
I had a dream the ocean was filled with orange soda
It was a Fanta sea.
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Thanks for all the sediment.
What is the best way to communicate with a fish?
Drop it a line!
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